DISCLAIMER : I BELIEVE THAT, NO MATTER HOW SERIOUS THE RELATIONSHIP IS, GIRLS ARE DESSERT. YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS DOOMED IF YOU PUT YOUR GIRL AS PRIORITY NUMBER ONE.

Sometimes you stumble upon a girl that you genuinely enjoy spending time with. How much is too much? I'm seeing one on an almost daily basis, with 1 day gap max between seeing. We're neighbors though, 5 mins away from each other. I'm a student on summer break so I got time to both pursue my goals and passions and spend time with her. If I would try and be more honest with myself, I would find that my personal development does suffer a bit from the relationship, as in I'm not fully investing myself, half-assing it etc. But I've done some life purpose work and found out that half of what I want in life is a quality companion. Shocked me because I was the lone wolf, spin plates type. My ideal life would always include a fulfilling romantic and emotional relationship. So I've commited myself to that more, also as part of personal development - studying sexual and social dynamics, intergender stuff, TRP material but more on the side of relationships and not seduction ( I feel competent in approaching and seducing). Also, I spend time with her, because it's truly fun and I wouldn't rather be doing anything else at that moment. There's an element of fear all the time though - I'm not gaming her in the sense of the amount of time I allot to her, attention in the form of seeing her ( I do balance attention though), so I fear that I would fuck up attraction that way, I want to be the magic fun adventure guy, with a hint of beta security.

Seeing a girl that often is something I would never do, for a healthy relationship. I kind of relaxed into it because this girl is really into me, missing me before we even part and often crying when we separate. It might be getting codependent on her part, but that's her capacity I guess.

I talked to a RP friend about this and he asked me - why are you depriving yourself? why are you depriving her of you? ( considering the way I text her, it's really minimal , like 1:7 ratio) . He also said "if you're enjoying it don't deprive yourself". But I want this to be a healthy, quality relationship and to last as long as possible. I don't want toxicity, I don't want pathologies. I don't want attraction and romantic love to wane.

So I'm stuck between satisfying my own and her desires whenever I want to see her or talk to her or vice versa, and my usual gaming principles which are just not communicating so much so that longing makes the heart grow stronger.

​

TL;DR 10 months relationship of almost daily communication. How much spending time together is too much and counterproductive for a healthy relationship?