I thought I was done with 100-content (I like the number 12), but here's a glaring one I was recently reminded I left out, and I'm sure there's more.

FRAME IS NOT:

  • Avoiding getting butthurt.

  • Biting your tongue.

  • Being snarky in the face of an emotional whirlwind.

  • Being an unmoveable rock against pressure.

  • Stoicism.

I get the sense from here and MRP that many new guys think some or all of these things about "frame" - that somehow being stoic and snarky means you have a great frame. Just ... no. Those are all things that are natural byproducts of frame. They are things that guys with a strong frame will do because of their strong frame. But they are not your frame itself, nor are they things you do to "maintain a strong frame."

WHAT IS FRAME?

I've heard it said on MRP that frame is "who you want to be on your best day." I've also heard of it as "the projection of your worldview onto the world." Holding frame, therefore is living and experiencing your best all the time, no matter what challenges creep up, never acting inconsistently with the worldview within which you want to operate. Breaking frame, then, is being someone you don't want to be or operating in someone else's worldview.

For Christians, let me tweak this: your frame is who God created you to be and incorporates projecting God's worldview through our lives onto the world. In short, it is your identity. Secular RP lets a man choose his own frame. Christian RP dictates that God assigns us a frame, at least in its core. Holding frame, then, is living out who God calls us to be, no matter what challenges creep up, and projecting God's character to the world through our lives. Breaking frame in a Christian context will be addressed in Part 2.

STRENGTH OF FRAME

Another way to think about it is to consider your life as a movie. After all, God is writing a story with time and you're part of it. You are the main character of the plot thread that links the events of your life together. If someone were to watch a movie of your life, your frame is what they would see in you as a character and the influence you have on the plot.

The strength of your frame is, in part, an indication of how "main" your character is - particularly in the lives of others. For example, if I were watching a weak man's movie, I might say, "That's cool, but that alpha side character stole the show." Did he steal the show by being a pompous jerk? Maybe, but probably not. He did it by being the guy that everyone really wished the movie was about.

For example, my kids love the movie Moana. Although the movie is named after her and it's clearly designed by the writers to be her story, Dwayne Johnson as Maui obviously stole the show. He's the one who set the context for Moana's journey and is overall the more interesting character. Although she may have been more determined and persistent and tenacious than him, his frame was stronger than hers. At the end of the day, the plot moved forward on his terms and Moana was mostly there to persuade him to act. It was when HE decided to get things done that things finally got done.

So, if someone were watching a movie about your marriage, for example, would they see you as the main character to whom everyone else responds, or would your wife be the one who runs the show and you're just responding to her? Everybody Loves Raymond is another great example of this. We know that Ray is supposed to be the main character, but his wife is really the one who runs the show - not just because she has a more dominant personality than Ray, but because virtually all plot mechanics revolve around her worldview. Ray and company are always trying to appease her wishes and desires, which is the mentality that drives the show forward. Ray simply isn't interesting enough to hold anyone's interest apart from the conflict caused by his wife's projection of her worldview and expectations.

So, is your worldview creating the context in which everyone else around you operates, or are you merely responsive to someone else's (or even several others') influences on your life?

NOTICE that I did not say that a person's frame is strong if he bosses everyone else around and they happen to do it. This might be an indication of a strong frame, but there are numerous other ways to have a strong frame without being bossy. Instead, bossiness might be a facet of your individual frame, if you choose to make it so.

WHAT IS YOUR FRAME/IDENTITY?

I have put an immense amount of research into this and Romans 8:16-17 sums up all of my findings quite perfectly: "The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs - heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him."

Your identity is that you are an adopted child of God and co-heir with Christ. Period. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. What that means will be addressed more in Part 2.

NUANCED INDIVIDUALITY IN FRAME

Premise

Despite having a common core identity, God has created us each uniquely. Romans 12 and 1 Corinthians 12 are both clear that we are one body with one common identity and purpose, one Spirit, one love - but that body has many parts and we each hold our unique place. I believe this works on both a categorical (i.e. roles/positions) and individual level. So, while our core identity might be in common among all believers, our specific blend of function and qualities/traits are unique to us.

To that end, some will be extroverts, others will be shy; some will love sports, others books; some will be intelligent, others passionate. We will all embody a balance of different traits. Although your core identity is given by God, the specifics of how you will live out that identity are often left for you to discern and sometimes decide. In this regard, you have a modicum of flexibility in discerning how you want to portray yourself to the world, although the Bible still gives guidelines on even this.

Mission-Oriented Traits

I always recommend finding your mission first. Your mission will determine which nuances of your frame you should be focusing on. You must become the kind of person who can live out the calling on your life.

"Disciple-making" is a mission I lay on all Christians, but even at that there are nuances about it. If I am gifted as a teacher, I will utilize one-on-one teaching sessions as my context for making disciples. If I am gifted at hospitality, I will invite individuals into my home to share my life. If I am gifted at prophecy, I will speak into the deep places of those I'm working with. If I'm gifted at mercy, I will comfort those around me who are mourning to establish a context for speaking the Word into their lives.

Or to go a different direction, if I'm an extrovert, I'm going to do active things with others so they can observe my life and learn from me. If I'm an introvert, I'll invite them into a private conversation, perhaps at a corner table over coffee. If I love sports, I'll invite them to play on my team. If I like running, I ask them to run with me. If I do the grocery shopping for my house, I have them walk the aisles with me. Get it?

Disciple-making is your mission. How you do it is your calling. See 209 for more. Likewise, your identity is common, but your expression of it (i.e. your frame) is nuanced to your situation - and those nuances should support what is necessary to fulfill your calling.

If your calling is to play sports all the time and to share Christ with those on your team, or to invite those you disciple to join your team ... it wouldn't make much sense if part of your frame was being the guy who is a movie aficionado, watching Netflix all day. Likewise, if your calling is to reach movie-lovers, you'd be making a mistake spending 10,000 hours trying to master the art of ice hockey to develop a hockey-player's frame. But both the athlete and the movie lover would do well to hit the gym and spend some time relaxing to Netflix every now and then.

God's Preparation

So now I ask: What is your mission in life and who is God shaping you to be in order to live out that mission? Don't try to create your own mission and then train yourself for it; accept the task God has assigned you, which I'm confident he has already been preparing you to carry out for quite some time.

Jeremiah 1:5 says, "Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations." God didn't give Jeremiah a choice on his mission and calling, he assigned it himself.

Then in verse 6 Jeremiah says, "Sorry God, but I'm not good at that." In 7-8 God replies, "I don't care; I'll make you ready." Then in verse 9 we see God touching Jeremiah's mouth and saying, "Behold, I have put my words in your mouth."

In short, God is the one who will work through you - who will prepare you for a calling and give you the context for fulfilling your mission. I firmly believe that he has already started doing that (see Acts 17:26-27).