-Disclosure: Pretty sure this qualifies as a rant-

I think oneitis kicked in full swing tonight, a week and a day after a breakup. I was also sobering up when I realized I needed to let this go, so there’s that. I met this girl long after discovering TRP. I knew it wouldn’t last, but I managed to drag it out from a short term to long term. Major red flags, but the LTR (2years) wasn’t too horrible. Basically, girl was depressed, major daddy issues (he raped her) but overall she was pretty submissive and behaved effeminately. Clingy, high n count, lazy as fuck, and a bit thicc, but that ass was nice and her face was still decently cute, great to fuck, has probably swallowed at least a gallon from my balls alone, and her submissive side-kick mentality made up for quite a bit. Still, bitch was an introvert type that just lives to consume her Facebook feed. We had previously gotten in fights because of basic shit. In other words, I got tired of getting on her ass to do simple things, like fucking clean, or do shit like going and playing tennis or some shit. Simple, self improvement shit. Big mistake. I could feel her losing respect for me, coupled with the fact I never respected her. On one occasion, I cheated on her to instill full dread and at one point prolonged the affair. That eventually died, but said LTR stuck around for year 2. Year 2 I decided to be a “better” (beta) boyfriend. Most I did was I would go out on dates without escalating and now and then the dread was enough. But this bitch needs a lot of dread. Even then, that wasn’t enough. I basically got tired of her shit near the end; fully committed to cheating on her (she caught us) and in the midst I just dumped her outright. Just told her I was done. Shit goes downhill from here. A few days in, I had seller’s remorse and tried to yoke her back. “Sure I want to be with you, OP.” Two weeks and two fuck weeks later, she moved out of her brother’s and into a trap house with some ‘gay’ friend. Probably back on the CC.

I’m fucking retarded. I hate these hoes’ sales pitch bullshit. And just when you think you’re not buying it, you’re still spending/wasting time with them. I ruined the relationship in the first place, because I could feel just how the juice wasn’t worth the squeeze. I committed to leaving her. Now I’m pulling myself back together from pouting and saying stupid shit like how I miss her. Nah, I miss the idea of her. The good times. But I know I would have never fucked things up to begin with if I hadn’t had enough.

I don’t know. I do know this post is cringey as fuck, and something I needed to puke out my system. I know I partially freaked out from the loss due to the lifestyle change, the lack of any social circle as I just about lost everyone being with this vapid hoe, and basically how between the fat slut and the mistress, I lost most of my things. (Wasn’t too much to begin with) I know I was pretty codependent too; being neglected by my parents in adolescence really threw my life off the rails for a bit. But I’m a 22 year old man now, and my main mission should be to pick myself back up, live a legend so all these sluts and kings like you reading this know my name, and give the finger to anyone that ever doubted me.

And I’ll leave you guys on this note: always make her swallow. If she’s over 20, she’s going on a downhill ride. Might as well train her for the next guy, because she wants to throw her life away.