Sorry for the self-deprecation, I’m not one to post shit like that but I had to)

Got redpilled in September of 2019, quickly got a grip on its principles and got my first gf in the following weeks (it didn’t last long but whatever). I barely managed to get my grades up too (it’s important for the rest of the post.)

Come January, I decide it’s time to lift and get my grades really high, in order to get a scholarship and gtfo of my house. Unfortunately, I can’t focus for shit in school, I’m tired all the time even though I sleep more than 8 hours and worse: the gym at my school is closed for construction.

I talked to my parents about it, and they told me: “Muh you don’t need a bench and a squat rack to get big, a yoga ball is all it takes” like I’m some fucking girl and “you don’t need to get big, you play soccer anyways”. Since I worked as a lifeguard for very little time, I don’t even have enough money for a 100$/year gym membership, and my parents (we ain’t poor) don’t want me to workout and won’t pay.

I’m just completely fucking lost. Everything seemed ok 2 weeks ago and now I’m just lost...