This is a quick two parter. First, Ive just moved to a new city, Seoul, and when I got here around a month ago I knew noone, so Ive been going out solo three or four times a week and if youre not doing it, unless your social life is one hundred percent impeccable, Id highly recommend taking it up.

In the last month Ive met and spent time with more new people than I did the previous twelve hanging out only with established friends. And not only women, Ive met two awesome wingmen, discovered a whole network of hidden and underground bars, venues, music nights, the kind of places I would never have found hanging out with my buddies. And honestly, more than that, the process itself has been insanely liberating. Theres nothing in the world like knowing that if the person youre spending time with doesnt cut the fucking mustard, you can drop them anytime anywhere and have a better night and more fun on your own. If you ever have nothing to do, you can create a night for yourself. Walking out the door on a Wednesday evening and not knowing who you are going to end up with, where youre going to go, but knowing that unless the fates align to screw you over youre going to have an good time, is absolutely awesome.

So seriously, if youre not doing it, at least occasionally, give it a shot. I know people worry about looking like a loser, but unless you are actually a loser, that shouldnt bother you, and as long as you carry yourself right you wont have a problem.

So on to part II, I was out on Tuesday night, met some guys, DJs and promoters that run some small local DnB events, we hit it off and they invited me to change venues to go drink soju with some girls they know. So we leave and by the time we get to the new place the girls are already there, we all sit down and I end up next to a girl, we'll say SoRa, who is a solid 7 (...like most girls here. If you have any kind of a thing for asians you should check out Seoul at least once in your life. Imagine if everyone in America was slim, well dressed, with long hair, high heels and a complete inability to speak too loudly. Its pretty good.)

As soon as I sit down I feel the impulse to start talking to SoRa, shes cute, just my type, we're right next to each other, and I want to, but I was in the middle of a conversation with one of the guys on the opposite side of the table, and it was interesting, he was cool, so we just continue, and I basically didnt acknowledge that she was there. Soon enough another guy joins in, and being the only foreigher Im more or less the centre of attention, and it was as though I could palpably feel the mixture of resentment and piqued interest drifting off her. Why isnt he talking to me? Why are they all talking to him? WHY ISNT ANYONE PAYING ME ANY ATTENTION!?!

I shit you not within ten minutes she was all over me. Like almost embarrasingly so. Rubbing my arm, resting her head on my shoulder, we'd barely even said hello to each other. And I cant help but think if Id rocked up and starting hitting on her straight away, the shit tests would hath flowed out liberally and it would have become an uphill battle.

Getting the approval of the men at the table, while enjoying myself, the ambience, not heat-seeking the attention of any cute girl within 50 yards, has done more for my game the last month than all the clever lines and snappy dressing Ive been able to muster. And its really fun.