I'm 19m coming out of a year of celibacy, active duty marines, and am getting back into the game, but I'm rusty and after this night I need a mindset reset. Can you guys give any feedback/advice? It'd be much appreciated. Thanks homies.

Last night was the 80s party. I had the best fit in the place, got a fuck load of compliments, men and women. I was focused on having a good time, but my mind was set on getting with one girl. I passed up opportunities with less hot girls who I could've gotten with and probably piped, but I wanted to get with this one girl and that was on my mind. She arrived and it was super positive at first, she said PORPUS! I gave her a hug and showed her where to hide her white claws. Her friend even asked if I was Porpus and that this girl had been talking about me. Super positive. I disappear and am socializing/dancing whatever, FIRST MISTAKE, and end up back outside, where she is playing BP with Chad. I should've stayed with her and showed her around or became her BP partner. I ended up just standing there and watching them play BP, she was into Chad. I was getting hella 3rd wheel vibes and at that moment, I had to either make a move or walk away, but I decided to stay and just hover around. Mistake. I saw that she liked Chad, and they were playing BP which was building connection and there I was, like a beta bitch just bouncing around. I decided to take a celeb shot which I missed, then took another one against them and made it. That felt good. Again, I should've left here but I decided to watch the game play out. In my mind I was thinking as soon as this game is over I'll ask her if she wants to dance, but we haven't been really talking this whole time so that is just a little weird. If I was going to stick around I should've been more flirty with her, but she was into Chad so that would only make him more attractive in her eyes. Leaving is the move, lost cause, go on to another girl. I was just set on getting with this one though. We had hooked up in the past at one of my parties, I was in social God mode at the time, and fingered her in my little bro's room (a year ago). Game ends and she dashes off to find her friends. Oof. I'm talking to other girls, but all my conversations are platonic as shit. Not too bad, but honestly bad. Not much emotion in them. I got one girl on the dance floor and we were vibing so I ask her what her name is, she's interested, I'm feeling her up and she's down with it. I take her somewhere quieter to hear her. I show her the paintings in the house, convo is good, kino is great, Could've leaned in for the kiss, didn't do it. Show her the final painting, could've leaned in to hook up, didn't do it, friend shows up, takes her away. I go back to the dance floor, Chad #2 is with target bitch now, I try to ignore her cause I know that's the best option, she saw me as a beta before so there's no recovering now unless I am alpha as fuck and she approaches me. I just can't help but try and dance with her and shit, she's just showing signs of disinterest, moving away, turning away, so I'm just dancing with her friend and we're all just vibing. The amount of fun I was having was limited though because I went into it and had this mindset of being with this girl and that just didn't happen. Also I spent a solid hour outside talking to another girl, she was receptive to my touch and great conversationalist. We talked for so long about travel and snow and life and surfing and all that good stuff, good amount of emotion but kind of boring still for a game talk. I was touching her here and there and she seemed chill with that. She was in the laid back position though, and it looked like I was talking to her instead of her talking to me. I should've escalated more, but her eye contact was very limited, not very strong, and she was doing all the talking, she was leaning back, but I was touching her legs and she seemed down, maybe just a bit shy. She was also one of my sister's friends. Should've escalated and gotten rejected over just being stagnant beta pussy bitch. Should've been in the laid back position while she talks to me. I brought her outside again later to scope the stars and was gonna send it, but her friends and my sister were all right there so she went there to sit down and we all talked for a little. I went back inside to keep dancing with people, Chad #2 with his arm wrapped around target bitch, there was a super hot girl that was friends with my sister, and she seemed like she could be down, my mindset was kind of tarnished at this point though, and every bold move I made was with hesitation. Fuck that. Also I was very sauced at this point. I wrapped my arm around her waist a few times and she seemed down with it, it was just part of the dancing. Wasn't bold enough though. Could've been more bold, squared up to her, danced with her, what have you. I could've been bolder all night. My conversations were boring and platonic with no emotion, my movements were nervous and hesitant, my mind was just set on this unrealistic expectation of getting with this bitch who wasn't down for me anymore (why would I want to get with her if she's not down anymore? Fuck that), and I didn't take advantage of opportunities when they came up, I wasn't bold enough to make that move, be vulnerable. Most girls I had conversations with probably didn't know I had a penis.

I ended up approaching this girl seated on top of the counter at the end of the night and she was so bored when I was talking to her, looking around, I was negging her about being boring, but she just wasn't into it, ended up leaving to find her friends. I'm proud I stayed in the interaction at least, that's something I failed to do with target bitch, but that conversation was fucked up, I need to work on that. I do remember a conversation that I was having with a girl and I was asking boring questions to which she was giving boring responses, but then I called her out on something, don't remember what it was, but that lit her up, it gave her some emotion, I was being slightly disagreeable and that made me a challenge for a brief second and I could see her react to what I said (she was pretty drunk). Chad #2's body language was super grounded, slow but purposeful, bold, direct, masculine. He didn't need to be jumping around and getting crazy like a little boy, he was just relaxed and slow but strong and purposeful with his movements. He wasn't reactive to anything, the music, the people, the girls, even me putting my arm around him and tugging him down, didn't react. Immovable mountain.

To work on:

I gave too many fucks. Need to care less.

Body language throughout the night was kind of swaying, half-send, a little nervous. I need to work on being more grounded, relaxed and purposeful, masculine.

Mindset was focused on specific outcome, doomed from the start, couldn't re-correct. I need to work on being outcome independent.

Conversation was boring as fuck, platonic, didn't say anything polarizing. Need to work on spiking girls emotions in conversation, being disagreeable, not giving a fuck.

Need more reference experiences with hotter women.

Is this correct? What are your thoughts? Thanks for the feedback boys.