"The Candy Shoppe"

Summation- The hypergamous nature of women is built in a manner advantageous to the truly enlightened RP alpha when compared to his beta, unenlightened or “false-alpha” counterparts. This parable was constructed to lieu this fact.

”The Candy Shoppe”

Once upon a time, there was a young girl by the name of Emily.

Emily’s mother had promised that if she’d behaved whilst they’d gone shopping, she’d take her to the out to the Candy Shoppe as a reward. Throughout the entire trip, Emily stayed on her best behaviour, and to honour her obedience, Emily’s mother walked her down the street to pick out some candy.

The Candy Shoppe was bigger and more extravagant than Emily could ever have imagined. There were chocolate bars, lollipops, and gum drops of all sizes. Emily had never seen so much candy in her entire life! Her mouth began to water at the thought of it all.

Her mother handed Emily a $10 bill and patted her on the head. “I’ll be back in 30 minutes.” Her mother explained, “Hurry and pick something sweet so we can go home to your father.”

As soon as her mother walked back out of the entrance, Emily ran wild. She didn’t know where to begin! She dashed up and down each aisle, touching this candy and that. Oh, the choices she had!

In her excitement, she accidentally collided with the elderly man who’d appeared from behind the counter.

“Whoa there, slow down lil’ lassie,” the elderly man chuckled, “there’s plenty o’ time t’choose an’ plenty o’ candy t’choose from.”

The elderly man bent down, ruffled her hair and smiled. “I’ll make you a deal.” He grinned, “You can sample 1 one each type of candy I’ve got, but you can only purchase one.”

Emily thought about that. Taste as many sweets as she wanted was too good of an offer to pass up.

“Deal!” Emily exclaimed excitedly and resumed her fervent search through the candy store.

One display immediately caught her attention. It was the biggest display in the entire Candy Shoppe, fitted with shiny golden accents, standing 8 feet tall with a smiling cartoon prospector waving back-and-forth at the very top. Grendall’s Glorious Chocolate Bars was written at the top of the display in golden flashing letters. “You’ll be Grinnin’ if you go with Grendall!” announced the toothy-talking prospector.

Emily’s eyes widened. She slowly approached the display, broke off a sample piece of chocolate and stuck it in her mouth. Amazing, she thought to herself, every second better than the last.

“That’s our top o’ the line candy.” The elderly man commented, noticing the expression on her face. “Nothing quite beats’a good old Grendall bar.”

“How much?!” Emily demanded, the $10 bill firmly gripped in her hand.

“Oh, those’ll cost you a mean $25 dollars.”

Emily’ little heart sank. She only had $10 dollars, so she was forced to solemnly place the chocolate bar back on the display and move on.

Emily soon came upon a display of Juicy John’s Magic Gobstoppers. They were very large, though they looked a bit plain.

“If you’re looking for a candy to last you, those’ll do the trick.” The elderly man called to her from across the store. Emily shrugged and stuck one in her mouth. Surely they weren’t as plain as they looked. And the sample was free, after all.

They were sweet, Emily thought, but maybe too sweet. The more she sucked the sweeter it got. And it showed no sign of getting smaller. She sucked and sucked and it got sweeter and sweeter to the point Emily couldn’t bear it any longer.

She took the gobstopper out of her mouth and snuck over to the trash can in the corner of the Candy Shoppe. She waited until the elderly man’s back was turned before throwing it in the garbage. She didn’t want to hurt his feelings, after all.

Emily soon came upon a display of gumdrops bearing a very vivid label. Smilin’ Sam’s Super-Duper Sweet Gumdrops read the wrapper in large, bold letters. The candy looked very expensive and Emily wondered if she could afford it.

“How much?” Emily inquired.

“Those?” the elderly man responded, scratching his chin. “I was originally selling them for $15, but I s’ppose they’re on sale. $5 dollars.”

What a bargain! Emily thought to herself. She quickly tore of the wrapper and stuck one in her mouth. “Careful.” The elderly man cautioned her. “Those are supposed to be extremely sweet.”

They were not sweet at all. In fact, they were very bitter. So bitter, Emily wondered if they were even candy at all.

This time, Emily didn’t care about the elderly man’s feelings. She spat the candy on the ground and vigorously wiped her tongue.

“That’s not sweet at all!” She angrily exclaimed. “The wrapper lied to me!”

The elderly man frowned. “I s’ppose that’s why they’re going for so cheap.” He scratched his head and pondered. “I guess that’s also why I still have s’many.”

Emily angrily moved on to a rather ordinary display at the back of the Candy Shoppe. There were no flashy banners, frills or vivid decorations. It looked almost handmade, carved from the same wood the Shoppe was made out of. On the display sat 3 candy bars, all wrapped in a blank, white wrapper with Jameson’s Chocolate Bars written across them in black ink.

“Those’re my personal creation.” grinned the elderly man, “best seller in the Shoppe.”

Emily twisted her face. “But what’s so special about these? They’re so plain looking.”

“A shiny wrapper won’t make a candy bar taste any sweeter.” The elderly man explained. “In th’ end, it’s the way it tastes that matters.”

The elderly man had a point, thought Emily. She began to unwrap the candy bar.

“Holl’on there lil’ lassie. I’m afraid ya’ can’t sample those.” The elderly man grinned once more. “You jus’ gotta trust me.”

Emily looked back over the Candy Shoppe, at all of the flashy wrappers, bright lights and flashing displays. She then looked back down at the blank-wrappered candy bar in her hands.

“How much?” she quietly asked.

The elderly man pondered. “$10 dollars exactly.”

Emily handed him her $10 dollar bill just as her mother strolled through the front door. “It’s time to leave, my dear.” Her mother called out.

Sitting in the car, on her way back home, Emily unwrapped the candy bar and took a big bite. She then sat in silence.

“How is it, dear?” her mother asked.

Emily grinned. “It’s the best candy I’ve ever tasted!”

END

LL- Staying true to what’s really important is all that's needed to become the best version of yourself possible and to attract women. Through the knowledge they've gained from their experiences in hypergamy, women want a man of resolve and substance above all else, and no amount of frivolous flash, gaudy extravagance or fictitiously dominant persona can substitute for a strong frame, enlightened soul and sharp mind.