For Best Hookup Results, Use Your Words, O.K.? - The New York Times

Westernhagen · 2018-01-26T15:24:55+00:00

Author Gabrielle Ulubay - WOULD NOT BANG.

No surprise at all she gets pumped and dumped.

I find myself thinking it will all get better when I find romance. When I have a man who wants me despite how fallible, loud or political I can be.

Yeah, good luck with that. My advice is shut up, and learn how to cook. Also, shut up.

I imagine reaching down my throat and rummaging until I find some bright little mass labeled “self-love.”

Was that what Aziz Ansari was looking for when he put his fingers in your mouth?

BluepillProfessor · 2018-01-26T14:41:19+00:00

Interesting takes by sleepyweasel and enjoy_life.

My take on it is this. What she's saying is "Use your words, but only when I want to, only when I want you to, and only when it benefits me."

The authoress says:

“Would you really rather someone tell you to your face that they don’t have feelings for you?” my friend said.

“I’d rather have that than be made to feel like an idiot,” I said.

I don't think so. She doesn't want to hear the truth. If she did hear the truth "I don't want to see you again" "I don't have feelings for you" "I'm married", the piece would have looked very different.

"He dogged me out! He used me! He led me on! He duped and tricked me into sex with him! He lied to me! He lied to me! Sexual harassment! Sexual assault! Rape! #MeToo! #TimesUp!"

No, ladies, you want your pretty lies. You want us to lie to you. You want us to make you feel whatever it is you want to feel in that moment, and the truth doesn't matter. The truth matters only later, when you want something different or when you have to go about the hard business of actually relating to someone else. When it comes to sex and hookups, you want your escape, your illusions, and your sleight of hand.

I secretly hoped that he was the same as me, that his chest also simmered with hidden indiscretions, and that the speed with which we slept together was as typical for him as it was for me. Because if it wasn’t, I would have to wonder if, upon discovering the truth, he would recoil. I would have to wonder if he would think of me as dirty or morally deficient, even though he already said he found me gentle.

Translation:

I secretly hoped he was as big a liar as I was. I want him to be as dishonest with me as I have been with him and with others. I want him to be as big a slut as I've been. I want us to be equally lacking in personal integrity. Because if he has more integrity than me, that will mean he is a better human being than I am. And that will put him in a position to judge me and reject me. And then I will feel bad. And if I feel bad, it is because someone else made me feel bad. And it is a crime for a man to make me feel bad.

I really don't think they want honesty. This is hamsterwheeling at Mach 3.

enjoy_life88 · 2018-01-26T13:12:17+00:00

I bet she could go on citing quotes from hookups for eternity.

Damaged 100+-n-count example.

Devilsgun · 2018-02-01T16:07:35+00:00

For best relationship results, put on your Big Girl Panties and play nice with the boys, O.K. Sweetie?

I can be condescending and use Universal Mommy Language insults too you stupid cum dumpster.

dustinthew1nd · 2018-03-13T16:21:26+00:00

"I had invited him over only for sex, " - stopped reading at that point. hoe

Title	For Best Hookup Results, Use Your Words, O.K.? - The New York Times
Author	sleepyweaselisawake
Upvotes	32
Comments	9
Date	January 26, 2018 11:37 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/7t3yuu/for_best_hookup_results_use_your_words_ok_the_new/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/for-best-hookup-results-use-your-words-ok-the-new.350200 https://theredarchive.com/post/350200

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