Link: https://www.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/dxbyyp/date_them_like_you_hate_them/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x

Date them like you hate them

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One of the best approaches I have found to dating is to think of the process as a competitive game. To draw on game theory, the particular game can be a zero sum game if your partner/opponent is a low value douchebag while in the best case scenario it is a non-zero sum game where both you and a high value man can mutually enrich your lives in the process. The trick is that going into a certain iteration of the game you can't know right off the bat what kind of game this will be. As a result, the best strategy is to always aim to increase your gain of utility.

This is the kind of scenario where the FDS rules shine. Let's say the guy turns out to be a douchebag. Well, at the very least if you are going to meet him you can get a nice meal out of the process while investing minimal time and effort. Once you realize that he brings no real value to him you say goodbye and you ghost him. This is an example of a zero sum round where the douchebag loses the money he invested in the date and you gain a dining experience (at the expense of some time).

On the other hand let's say you meet a person who turns out to be a high value man. He still pays on the very first date so you begin with a win. But if he proves worthwhile, you begin to reciprocate in terms of affection, trust and commitment. Of course the man still must continuously invests his resources into you (both money and time), so you always continue to gain utility from the relationship. However since you reciprocate now the man also starts to win, so that your aggregate utility increases (hence why it's not a zero sum game overall).

But to wrap thing back to my admittedly somewhat clickbaity title, the trick is to come in with a calculating mind and a closed heart. Because most men are douchebags, your default assumption should be that he is not a nice guy and your goal should be to extract as much utility from him as you can. Only when he starts proving himself to be worthy of you do you begin to reciprocate and give back to him! This way no matter what kind of game you find yourself in, you always come out the winner.