Sorry for my broken English in advance.
I am 20. I feel so lost and aimless, I can't set myself a goal and actually do it. I sleep long everyday, wake up, browse the internet for a couple hours and watch stuff like "Coach Red Pill", he's the closest thing I've gotten to a fatherfigure. And then I work on my music for some time, and tell myself it's shit. And that's my average day.
I make electronic music, and I have flair for it, it's the only thing I have flair for tbh. I want to make a living from it. I have set myself a goal that I want to make at-least 300 dollars a month from it in 7 months. But I don't have the discipline, I've never learned it, my mom never taught me to make my homework and so on. And that's a big issue.
Another Issue is all of this anger I have towards the world, and especially towards women after taking the red pill. But it makes totally logical sense. I will move out from my mom in August which I look forward to.
I recently stopped with my therapist because I called myself a looser, and she said "Well, if you don't want to get better there's nothing I can do for you", and I left.
I'm taking LSD tomorrow with a couple of buddies, hopefully that will allow me to come in contact with my subconscious, and sort some stuff out.
I go to school but I can't see myself in any jobs it can give me access to. I hate to work for someone, I don't like to get told what to do, I can't see myself in a corporate environment.
Any advice is GREATLY appreciated. thanks!
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