I didn't realize how much of a simp I had been in my past until recently. But this evening, I managed to really, really shock a woman and make her realize I'm not like "normal" guys.

About 6 months ago, I got talking to a girl who said she liked me. We lost contact until 1 month ago. She started messaging me again. Now she had a boyfriend but she was trying to message me on the side (as friends). I said no. And said I won't be her friend. I see her as a potential partner and sexually attractive. I told her I won't be a friend and I won't have that kind of relationship with her.

By doing this, I'm reminding her that I'm the prize. I'm absolutely not a simp who will offer a shoulder to cry on and not get laid for it. I'm not going to give her advice on her relationship or listen to her problems when I've literally been trying to get with her.

Psychologically, by saying NO, you're asserting your dominance and confirming to both yourself and the girl that you're the one who calls the shots. You're the one who makes the rules and that she's the one who can't talk to YOU because of her actions. Likely, she'll try to get back with you (in this case me), but you've got the upper hand.

Something I've learnt: Do not allow women to treat you like a simp. Respect them e.g you don't need to show or swear. By setting the rules, you're showing that you're not some desperate loser and she has to meet YOUR criteria if she wishes to continue.