It just really sucks knowing what I know now. That women only manipulate you with sex. I have never been good with women any and I haven’t had sex in about 3 years. I go to the therapist and she is a women. It is a therapist at a university too. She is literally no help and I leave disappointed almost every time. I am still contemplating on seeing her still. I deal with depression, I got diagnosed with schizophrenia at 18, I am 27 now. Kinda social awkward and shy. Especially around women. My first girlfriend mentally abused me and then physically abused me when I started psychosis. She also cheated on me with one of my friends. That’s what scares me about dating. That’s what makes me not want to date.

I am just happy that I am done with classes towards my degree. Only an internship now. I am in a predominately female populated major. These have been some of the loneliest years of my life. I made one friend who was a guy who reached out to me who saw that I was lonely. Other then that I didn’t really make any friends with the rest of my classmates. I think they being of the other gender had something to do with it.