As a 31-year old man, I've come to the realization that putting women on a pedestal has greatly affected my ability to lead a normal and enjoyable life. This isn't an exaggeration.

I come from a place where women are celebrated, mostly because of strong female influences early on in life. In my case, my mother abandoned me when I was 3. As an adult, I can admit that I spent my childhood and teenage years, searching for that one motherly figure to make everything alright. I got a step mother who killed my inner child, abused and suffocated me until the day I left the house. I was also rejected by my aunt and sister-in-law. But I understand their situation, I wasn't their responsibility.

I was emasculated, ridiculed for being clinically depressed, for being vulnerable, and not being able to live up to my potential. Not by my dad or friends, but by the women in my life whose approval I sought for so many years. I am frustrated and am done being a failure in my own eyes.

I have two engineering degrees and haven't worked in my field because I have zero drive and nobody to work for. I attached my self worth to their approval. The cynicism and dehumanizing aspects of those relationships is discouraging. I know what I am capable of and I will no longer let them control my life.

P.S. English isn't my first language.