When you say "single mother" do you mean any mother raising a kid alone or one who chose that lifestyle in particular?

I think it's fucked up to include widows when people are being particularly vitriolic about single mothers. Like, my father died and then my mother was literally hit by a car which made her much less attractive (making it very difficult to ever find another mate). I don't like her being included in "single mother" hate because it seems like really the issue is women who CHOOSE that lifestyle. Can someone clarify?