This concept was greatly influenced by a comment in a recent post in which a TRP poster from high school relayed his saga of a g/f who made a fake claim to being kidnapped by a rival. I'm fairly sure it's been removed, but if not, someone can post the title, I'd like to point the author of that comment, given my recent thought into the level of insight on that comment as it slow burned over the last week or so.

The "clever" kid that he is, he decides to try and strong arm a report to the authorities through her father, that will make the girl either "shit or get off the pot." Assuming that she will make the claim that she was in fact kidnapped by his rival, grinding him through the court system, or have her publicly immolated as she back tracks.

The father however, saw right through this. This I thought was an important revelation.

On the one hand, many fathers would be oblivious to what was playing out. But this guy, being more of the strong type, knowing women better, knew instantly what was up. That his daughter had gotten busted. At this point, his interest was saving face and the guy does an absolutely masterful job of bamboozling the kid into buying hook line and sinker "shit is about to go down."

But as aware as that father was, I thought to myself, he's still just understanding the game, as it is played. He knows this kid is out, and her "kidnappers" were in.

But at some point, the games stop being so child like. At some point, the stakes get raised, and only the true bastards survive a woman's innate self destruction as she "finds herself" on her path to "self actualization."

The weak & the strong : Not all that different

If her father is weak, invariably she'll learn as her mother psychologically demolishes her father, how a family operates and how she should treat the men in her life.

Men with options will treat her like poison, because she is. So, by design, she'll accumulate a number of weak men into her life and play out the script that she learned at home a couple times.

If her father is psychologically strong however, more often than not, her mother will be more feminine, even if outside of the house she is a high powered type.

This is a much more nuanced exchange here than is worth typing out, because each relationship will go through it's own settling of power. But suffice to say, the vast majority of relationships will settle this power dynamic early in the relationship, which is why men at MRP can have some seriously long and dragged out reversals in their marriage.

I've said before that at MRP, many men do what is akin to telling their wife, who works at a bank, that they're going to show up with a fake gun to rob the bank. Maybe for a while she pretends that she's scared, and she tells him "pweese, pwetty pweese don't shoot me, you bad bad man." But eventually that gambit too will end and she'll laugh him out of the bank.

Then he threatens to show up with a real gun. Even as he begins shooting the tellers, she laughs. None of this changes the way she feels, or her plans for the future.

Finally, he sets the bank on fire. She'd still be unmoved, but she now realizes that she's on fire and begs him to put her out, she just wants her old life at the bank back. But it's too late.

One of the saddest and most profound realizations that anyone that follows this type of thing should have, is just how many men hope they can amicably resolve the issues within their marriage, above the table, in a mutually beneficial way.

Few men can truly grasp the concept of facta non verba until they've been viscously unplugged by a woman who they believed was the exception to the rule, who wore her mask exceptionally well. It was only when amicable resolution was completely incongruent to her behavior, and no benevolent explanation could suffice, that he was forced to reconcile her behavior with his unwillingness to process reality as it was, not how he wanted it to be. This is where men are shocked into cPTSD. They exit it by either deciding she was bad, he failed the duty of performance (work harder plow horse), or by actually understanding the content here. This allows the brain's threat detection system to relax. The only one of these that a man truly grows from is the last relief valve.

But the truth of the matter is this. Both fathers, the weak and the strong, are almost equally as likely to end up at this point, and both are equally as likely to listen to her demands and try to meet them in an honest manner.

If she says jump, he will ask in some way, "how high?" If she says 30 feet, he'll either start designing his spring shoes or he'll start laying out the math why such a thing isn't possible.

And from this, we can get a real take away.

It was important to lead up to the conflict in a marriage or LTR and for men to understand that being sharp with women, or even being dominant is no recipe from disaster.

Failure is a feature, not a flaw in sexual selection.

However, men who really understand how it works, will operate in a way that neither the weak or the strong father will be able to accept or tolerate.

These men almost certainly will be old books types (credit to Rollo). The weak and the strong are just two different sides of the plow horse coin. The weak man believes his currency is agreeableness and his willingness to do what is "right." The strong man believes his currency is that he "is the best" while still operating in a rigidly female centric manner. It is at best, male theatre. Any "threat" that the "strong" father poses, is illusory, he's still a dancing monkey who at best evens the playing field by having dread on his side. But almost all of them, with the exception of the few that have been truly unplugged, wouldn't dream of operating outside of that feminine frame that they've digested as masculine.

And both women, will tolerate this, in their own ways. Because LTRs are, for the most part, constructed by women, for control. And so, they are like the MRP "bank skit" acutely aware of the dynamics and power they hold.

Forget the idea that either of these men would be mortified to know she lets you have anal, or you two dressed up like farm animals one time. Or maybe even that you choke her and ask if she like's being a dirty little slut. Even the weakest father will just go "ewwwwww" and move right past this. Even the weakest father will understand a woman who is a plate.

But ask yourself this.

"If he had a camera into our day to day interactions, would his instinct to protect his daughter kick in?"

"Would he hate me?"

"Would he bring a shotgun and a shovel?"

It is I think, intuitive to think that you would be on the up and up with the stronger of these two, and that he would understand you're just doing what makes her happy. But assuredly, he's an old books man.

Unless this guy is a certified lay machine (in which he would share your understanding of women), you should hope that his understanding of your relationship in totality would terrify and anger him. That he would want to show up with a shotgun having you beg for your life.

And so ask yourself this, "would her father show up with a shotgun, if he knew our relationship dynamics?"

This litmus test almost invariably will reveal the frame you're operating in. Because no such mainstream viewpoint of a male dominant relationship exists, you should assume that your relationship would start on the gradient of "is this abuse?" to "grab the shotgun and a shovel."

This is just a final reconciliation of boiling down to one idea what will tell you where you're really at. Plate, girlfriend, wife, it doesn't matter.

Even if you think back to your old relationships, when did they fail? In the times her father would say "you're a good man" or when he'd be "outraged at how you're treating her?"

It is so common for any man to confuse "treating her nicely" with "treating her right." She didn't want the weak guy, and she didn't want "the strong guy" either. This is, again, Beauty & The Beast, 50 Shades, what have you. This is, tingles uber alles.

The provisioning relationship ends when the exceptions begin. And that is where the old books holders, on both sides of the isle, begin to say "is that abuse?"

These are the men that are forged in a vicious unplugging, and these are the men that are most in line with how women operate. They operate outside of a woman's game, and inside of her innate schema.

When men do this, we refer to them as "abusive." It's a cheat code in life. Women respond to behavior that society considers to be against its interests, and so, you are not allowed to behave in that way. Despite her positive reactions to such behavior.

But tingles uber alles. Do you want to be fighting about dishes, or gonorrhea (cha cha cha) from your threesome? Her saying she's sick, tired and has a headache, or being on the morning and night program so she stays your main plate? Her crying that she's unhappy in the relationship she said she wanted, or crying because she made an exception and has to share you?

So again, If he wouldn't bring a shotgun and shovel, you're losing.