"I was even just about to X, but then you X' d"

MrHocus · 2013-07-14T16:55:56+00:00

That's an empty future promise intended to HARM you with guilt. Ill repeat that, she is trying to HURT you by inflicting guilt on you.

I'd just say "I can only judge you by the actions you commit, not the actions you promise to commit in the future. And fact that you are trying to guilt-trip me makes me realize how empty your promise is.

People that are caught cast blame on their persecutors.

Exactly_what_I_think · 2013-07-14T15:41:05+00:00

"I was even just about to X, but then you X' d"

Stop lying to me.

projectself · 2013-07-14T16:22:59+00:00

Reward good behavior, ignore or punish bad behavior.

Your reward to her is validation, or more simply, your time. When she exhibits behavior that is unacceptable, remove yourself from the situation. The easiest was is to simple stfu, just shut up. Look at her without saying a word. Next is to occupy yourself with some other thing, go look at your phone, go to the garage or backyard. Lastly, leave, get up and leave the house and do not return for a few hours. Use the response that is inline with the behavior.

She is controlling the situation and frame this way. She is using shame to redirect the focus. Shame and guilt transferrance is the process where she takes her own bad feelings about "X" and transfers them to you for "Y". Do not accept her guilt to be given to you, do not accept her shame and blame. If you did something you feel is wrong, apologize and move on. If you did not then recognize this as the bad behavior it is and treat accordingly.

[deleted] · 2013-07-14T15:55:05+00:00

"LOL. Yeah, sure."

Or do X again (unless it'll take time and effort which makes it look petty).

veggie_girl · 2013-07-14T16:46:11+00:00

This is just a shit test. She will probably still X regardless of if you did Y. In my opinion she is trying to add a qualifier to why you don't deserve her doing X. You need to invalidate that qualifier. I think the easiest way is to push right through it.

"I was about to have sex (X) with you but then you did Y"

You have to understand that Y isn't important, you need to solve for X. Y is just a red herring because =X contains two variables, one that she knows and one that she thinks she knows. Under these circumstances the equation for getting X from her is: * X = (?/Y * 0) + (? * masculinity)

So what can you do? Well since she is placing so much value on her X variable you have to not react as if it was that important to begin with. After all, even if you want X, it is still only one variable in the equation of the interaction. There is also no value of Y other than the value the hamster is spinning out (which is worthless).

GayLubeOil · 2013-07-14T20:52:06+00:00

Think about it this way woman are emotional creatures. With a shit test like this its not what you say, its how you say it. If you loose control then that means she has the ability to control your emotions and she wins. Stay calm, express your point.

MarkyBhoy101 · 2013-07-14T21:36:51+00:00

Man I've been hearing this phrase since I was a little boy, from my Mum, Sister, Aunts, Grans, girlfriends, friends who are girls. They're trying to punish you for bad behaviour when really they've got no leverage over you.

Personally I do what I always do when chicks try to control me, laugh at them, make them angry with how amused you are by their bullshit and once they're all antsy in their pantsies turn the tables on them;

"Oh, I was going to buy you that dress but now..."

A little passive-aggression will speak to her on her level.

Or just ignore her, let her talk at you, don't give her any emotions, go do something else. Withdraw from her for a while and let her make first contact, let her apologise for her bullshit and then fuck her brains out and give her a good spanking.

throwawaygonnathrow · 2013-07-14T16:02:37+00:00

There's no single "best" response to this, you have to be adaptable. Just maintain frame and keep in mind that it's obviously BS. Depends on what kind of game you play, but responses I prefer are making a joke out of it and using it to playfully tease her or ignoring her attempt at manipulation and changing the subject. The two can go together.

Be the rock in the relationship. You are firm and consistent. She's trying to train you like a dog to not do X again. Show that you are unswayed by her, and that you'll do whatever you feel like and ignore her attempts to change you.

thereisnosuchthing · 2013-07-15T15:19:32+00:00

It is just an embarrassing example of who stupid and childish women are. If she says "I would have done X but". If you would have, but didn't, then you really "wouldn't" have, would you?

It's really sad when a girl you're involved with shows you that she is this dumb. It's just her trying to get her way.

favours_of_the_moon · 2013-07-14T17:43:36+00:00

It means you have won.

She's tried to shit test you, you've called her on her bullshit, and now she's throwing out sour grapes.

Fuck this bitch.

Dved · 2013-07-14T15:47:52+00:00

AVillain101 · 2013-07-14T15:48:11+00:00

Best thing to do is to not play into her bullshit. Tell her to stop it, leave, turn off your cell phone and don't talk to her. You can't let her think she can pull that kind of stuff without repercussions. EDIT: I accidentally the grammar

Title	"I was even just about to X, but then you X' d"
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	9
Comments	19
Date	July 14, 2013 3:28 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1ia208/i_was_even_just_about_to_x_but_then_you_x_d/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/i-was-even-just-about-to-x-but-then-you-x-d.5513 https://theredarchive.com/post/5513

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