Here is a great video by TFM about what the hell to do with yourself now you have taken the red pill and have gone full MGTOW.
There is a cool test to find the directions you could take.
Find your way.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1qXefiU_HY

This is part 3 of a series called The Red Pill Grief Cycle.
Part 1
Part 2