Camp near Lanjer, Ark. May 10th 1863.

"My Dear Amanda, It has been a long time since I had an opportunity of writing to you, and I gladly avail myself of the present opportunity. I am not certain that I will have a chance of sending this but I will write a few lines any how and try and get it off to let you know that I am among the living."

REAL Female Response: "I've been fucking your best friend David. He's here and you're not. If you don't stop writing me I'm going to report you."