Obviously I need to just get a new therapist. But in my small town, I fear it will be difficult to find a single, male therapist. I cannot relate to the things my current therapist is telling me because he just fundamentally does not understand me. I'm aware that when a defensive person is told to change, they often attack the person giving the advice in order to shift the blame and the responsibility of change off of themselves. But my therapist is an overweight fat, engaged to his secretary workaholic who twice now has forgotten to send me follow up e-mails about workout plans he's recommended.

With my permission, I allowed him to have a conversation with my mom and he reported back to me that "it breaks your mom's heart that you don't seem comfortable with women". Well, as bad as this makes me feel, I'm sure a lot of things break a lot of moms hearts (I could be transgender/a criminal etc etc etc and I'm not). I don't want to be this guy, an obese workaholic who works so much he cannot send follow-up e-mails who cannot understand this basic tenent of who I am; the fact that I do not want to be in relationships and that I will never have the same motivation he does to work to make a woman's like less difficult (he's expressed that he is happy his secretary fiance gets to have such a kushy job instead of have to "break her back" doing something else).

I don't know, should I just call, cancel my future appointments with him and do my best to find a male single therapist who will accept this about me? This has been weighing on me this weekend. Any advice is greatly appreciated.