I've noticed that as I've become more, for lack of a better term, "RP", mantras start to sink in and my life is a reflection of principles such as DGAF and abundance mentality. It takes a while, and initially, I tried to force myself to think and act that way, but eventually realized that it's just time that shifts your dynamics. Somewhat anti-"fake it till you make it". In the same light, time has done its job and positively altered many of my social interactions in favor of me being the leader, but I'm not sure how to control them now.

When I was high the other week, (I do it to better understand myself and think through abstract concepts which usually reverts to me resolving that everything is a power struggle), I noticed how I was able to garner the social power between my friends and I. They relied on me to make decisions for the group. All the while, I had to make sure that all of their opinions and suggestions for what we do felt equally validated so there wasn't any animosity between people.

Childhood trauma I'm still resolving shifted my view of society to make me retain the belief that I'm not good at handling power. Yet as I become a version of the stereotypical "Chad" in some ways, I find that now I am perplexed on how to properly handle the power that I gain/command and frustrated I'm not doing it already. What do you guys suggest as actionable steps going forward so I can properly use time and deliberate practice to become more comfortable with this new role? Should I enter therapy to resolve these childhood issues or is that a bit overkill?