So my whole life my family have always argued, my mother being mad at my father for not doing anything e.g. he says "We'll get the kitchen fixed next week" and never doing it (for the past 15 years of my life my bathroom has been filled with rotting wooden floors, toiletry from 1900's, a shower of which spits so you can't properly wash, the oven doesn't fully close, etc. basically my father has given up on the house) honestly I'm not too bothered as I at least have a roof over my head.

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Sometimes the arguments get so I bad I literally have to go and say shit like "You're acting like kids, why are you arguing over this shit". Even both my older brother & sister are on anti-depressants but I feel like I will never fall into that pit as long as I can deal with my emotions internally.

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My father literally has slept downstairs for nearly all my life and passes out with an ipad in his hand after watching hours of youtube videos, of which I hear clatter to the floor every night, I have memories of my mother cutting herself when I was younger and her telling me that she fell, but even at that young of an age (~7) I knew she was doing it herself. I think my father may be depressed or something but he never really shows his emotions, only when he is angry or trying to be funny.

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My brother got the worse abuse as he was the first child, I just recently found out he was smoking weed when he was in school which is why he failed so many times and got low grades, but thankfully he passed college with a good mark, since then he has never returned home, my father rarely speaks to him and only mother speaks to him regularly, sends him money if he needs help (Of which my father sometimes gets mad). I honestly wish I had a better relationship with him but I feel like he is too old now (I don't even know his age which makes me extremely sad, something like 30+)

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Now the strange thing with my sister is that she is very smart, so smart that as she got the top score for her university and in the country, even 3 letter agencies were sending her job offers of which she has put on pause. But she acts very strange and disrespectful to my mother, calling her a bitch, loads of arguments etc. It was quite calm before she came back from college but it's like she brings dark energy with her.

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Honestly the thing that saved my life was taking LSD, I felt a love like I had never felt before and it opened my consciousness to realise there is much more for me than what "Reality" is truly shown to be. I am just done with this type of shit and wish I had no family, just so I could leave all this behind and live in my own house peacefully, the only thing is that I will feel bad for leaving my mother behind in this shit sty.

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TL;DR : Broken house with a broken family, I want to leave everything behind and I'm going to college soon so atleast I will be staying at the apartments there. What would be the best play here?