Context: I’m a HVW in almost every way but this sub has taught me I’ve been a sex pick meisha my whole life. I DID hang on to my virginity for a long long time and made my ex wait 6 months...but after that it was all down hill.

Ex #1- I was 20 he was 25. He took my V card and “taught me about sex” meanwhile I was his 40th sex partner. Puke.

  • he has a huge porn stash in his computer he never let me see
  • he had a competition with his friend to see who could sleep with the most amount of girls. He was in the lead before we met
  • obsessed with anal
  • would have sex anywhere and anytime (this shaped me into being the same way)
  • incredible at fore play
  • kink was to get me off. I faked every orgasm because of the pressure he put on me.
  • treated me like a queen to my face but was secretly porn sick
  • admitted to being addicted to porn when we broke up
  • cited porn as the reason for must of our problems.

Ex #2

  • is younger than ex one and has had 10ish partners
  • doesn’t want to know or care about my number of partners
  • year 2 we moved to a new city together (separate apartments I refuse to be a live in wife for free)
  • started acting distant and cold at night. Not wanting sex, not ever initiating etc. I broke up with him and two weeks later he told me he stopped watching porn and realized porn was messing with his mind and cause him to take me for granted. He didn’t need sex because he was doing himself so much. We got back together and the change was huge. He was genuinely initiating and enjoying it. It was like my old bf back when he stopped watching porn. I still ended things with him cause the damage of the past was too much.

With either guy, I couldn’t cum. Ex #1 was so porn sick he out soooo much pressure on me to cum that I faked 100% of the time. He got off on thinking he was the best ever in bed.

Ex #2 inexperienced and shitty at foreplay. Stop initiating and started rejecting me after heavy porn usage. Too bad in bed to make me cum. Too uninterested to learn.

So I’ve only had orgasms by myself with a vibrator.

Does a happy medium exists? It seems impossible to get a porn free Guy. I feel like a man has to be dedicated to being porn free before you meet him.

Are there guys who can watch porn and still have a healthy view on sex?

I want a guy who makes me cum. One that wants to satisfy my without it being a kink that comes with 50 other dirty ass kinks. Sometimes it seems like the guys who prioritize a woman’s pleasure tend to be the guys who are also into Anal play, S&M and other very kinky pornified things.

Is there a medium?? So I just have to little experience? I’ve fucked a double digit amount of guys. But those are all short term flings from when I’m traveling and never want to see them again lol. My relationship experience so far is scaring me…