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LTR vetting, n-count isn’t everything (within reason)

Gobraves44

December 17, 2018

1 upvotes

/r/askTRP

I always hear the n-count from friends when looking at LTR’s, and many have said under 5 or 2 partners per year as an estimate as fine. However, I think guys are aren’t looking at this deep enough.

Girl 1: notch count 1 - lost virginity to at 17 and has been dating same guy for 3 years and is now 20. They have had unprotected sex 3-4 times a week for 3 years. That’s a lot of sex and bonding.

Girl 2: notch count 4- lost virginity at 17, and has been with 4 guys over 3 years and is now 20. Always used a condom.

I would date girl 2 over girl 1 for a LTR.

My thoughts on this is 1) unprotected sex increases pair bonding over a condom ( no science on this, just believe it). A girl who has had unprotected sex for 3 years with the same guy will create more of a bond than the girl who used a condom had 4 partners over 3 years. I’ve heard increased n-counts lower pair bonding, girl 1 ( 1 partner) sounds like it would be harder to measure up, vs the girl with 4 partners.

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Post Information

Title	LTR vetting, n-count isn’t everything (within reason)
Author	Gobraves44
Upvotes	1
Comments	34
Date	December 17, 2018 4:19 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/a71799/ltr_vetting_ncount_isnt_everything_within_reason/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/ltr-vetting-n-count-isnt-everything-within-reason.70895 https://theredarchive.com/post/70895

Comments

[–]TheRedPillMonkey7 points8 points9 points 7 years ago (33 children) | Copy Link

[–]JJTheJetPlane72 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Gobraves44-1 points0 points1 point 7 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Endorsed ContributorKeffirLime0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Kurush5590 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Gobraves440 points1 point2 points 7 years ago* (28 children) | Copy Link

[–]TheRedPillMonkey1 point2 points3 points 7 years ago (27 children) | Copy Link

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[–]JJTheJetPlane70 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]TheRedPillMonkey0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (24 children) | Copy Link

[–]Gobraves440 points1 point2 points 7 years ago* (23 children) | Copy Link

[–]TheRedPillMonkey1 point2 points3 points 7 years ago (22 children) | Copy Link

First of all, I think you're talking about two examples that involve young women with low n-counts over all. Honestly, it's like asking would you rather drive a Ferrari or a Lamborghini. Neither one would suck. These theories matter more at scale.

That said, I think what you're thinking is that pair bonding increases over time, and that sex somehow earns you pair bonding xp points. (pbxp).

If a girl has had sex 150 times with a guy and earns xp every time, she has +150 pbxp. From there, you're saying it would take a lot longer for you to pass +150 pbxp than the girl with a 10 n count, or possibly 0 pbxp. Day 1 your pair bonded. At least, that's the closest analogy I can come up with based upon what you're saying.

However, pair bonding doesn't work like that. Think of it more like a cell phone battery. 0 - 100% is some percentage of bonded. Once at 100%, it doesn't go up any higher.

Sex in a LTR grinds you up to 100% (as does other things) but it also helps keep you there. It's like maintenance. Once a week sex doesn't increase your bonding, it maintains it.

Throughout the course of a LTR, bonding decreases until we do things, like sex, to power the bond back up.

Now, in your example, you need to keep in mind that girl 1 has lost her LTR. That meter is running at 0, and she's looking for someone to help fill it again. Maybe an orbiter or her tinder validation is keeping it hamstered at 10%, but she needs a real man and knows what that looks like.

Keep in mind there is a LOT more to pair bonding than just sex. This is why sluts don't pair bond well. They've never really bonded outside the bedroom. They think sex is all that is required. That's why they go from bed to bed, trying to "bond" with all these different guys.

The girl who had a 3 year LTR knows what else is required. She's seen it, lived it, and misses it. She's desperate to pair bond on all levels, both inside and outside the bedroom. That's why she's better LTR material.

Now, again, you're talking relatively low n counts as well as young girls. And like I said, n-counts can be somewhat worthless. So your 2 examples are seriously like 6 of one, half-dozen of the other. They are close enough where I wouldn't worry about either. But with that, a girl who can have a serious LTR, will always be a better LTR than a girl who can't.

[–]Gobraves440 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

Thanks for the reply! I really appreciate it. You broke this down excellently. Last question, i promise haha.

Is there a n-count where pairbonding is a lot harder?

For example, If girl 2 had ( 2-3 previous partners) vs girl 1 ( 1 previous partner). Would girl 2 have a harder time pair bonding with me? Because she’s had 1-2 more partners than girl 1? I’m trying to find what’s the cutoff where a girl’s n-count lowers pair bonding to exponentially. I guess I’m asking is there a cutoff of let’s say 3 partners and then it’s harder to pairbond. But would it matter if we were together for let’s say 2 years in the future. We would be very pairbonded imo in each scenerio ( 1 previous partner vs 2/3 previous partners)

Obviously virgin is ideal, but want your take on this scenerio. Thanks again for replying

[–]TheRedPillMonkey2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

Is there a n-count where pairbonding is a lot harder?

There is no number. Again, n-count isn't a good measure if used on it's own. Let's say a girl is 20 with a n of 5. Now let's say she's 15 with an n of 5. Now let's say she's 30 with an n of 5. Saying "n of 5 is the cutoff" is worthless. It takes nothing else into consideration.

My advice is to stop worrying about n count. There is nothing hard and fast about any number. You need to factor for age and LTRs at the very least before it's even remotely beneficial, and even then it's not a good indicator of anything unless her n count is at or above her age. Then she's just a cc rider.

Also, virgins aren't better. I'd rather the girl with the n count of 4 and no LTRs than a virgin. She at least knows that the fuck she's doing in the bedroom.

The best girl for a LTR is the plate you're spinning who goes above and beyond to treat you like her leader. The one who sucks your dick, then makes you dinner. Who would ditch her friends to hang with you, and who doesn't like leaving the next morning.

In other words, as a man, you should never, ever, actively seek a LTR. You should just seek to engage in sex with women you are attracted physically to, and let them seek and earn a LTR with you.

Sluts with abnormally high n-counts never try to earn an ltr.

Keep focused on mission.

[–]Gobraves440 points1 point2 points 7 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

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