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Anything I can say to recover here or is it a lost cause?

I_LUV_PALAK_PANEER

March 12, 2021

1 upvotes

/r/askTRP

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Title	Anything I can say to recover here or is it a lost cause?
Author	I_LUV_PALAK_PANEER
Upvotes	1
Comments	13
Date	March 12, 2021 1:30 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/m3hl0d/anything_i_can_say_to_recover_here_or_is_it_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/anything-i-can-say-to-recover-here-or-is-it-a-lost.751730 https://theredarchive.com/post/751730

Comments

[–]paizk 12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Nighthawk_Black_ 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]TehJimmyy 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]AshyLarry27 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]I_LUV_PALAK_PANEER[S] -2 points-1 points0 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]AshyLarry27 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

No, that would be worse. She changed her mind about you. Find other girls, this is actually a very important part of the process. Being able to get used to talking to other girls. If you latch onto the one girl you talk to every time, you will get comfortable with only her, build one-itis, and you won't refine your social skills when talking to other women. Its like anything in life. You get good at the things you practice over and over. Women become less scary to talk to, and you get your mind to better gear and have better and more organic responses to the conversation.

We don't know how the date went. All we can base this off of is "your" interpretation that the date went well. There are two red flags that stuck out to me:

1.) " Texted her the same evening saying I had a nice time and would love to see her again and she says yes for sure"

Don't ever text a girl about how "that was such a great date, oh boy golly gee I think it would be swell to do it all over again. I can't wait to see you!" These kinds of texts basically say you are extremely invested in her, which innately drops her interest/attraction in you. This isn't a job interview where you want to look nice and respectful. It makes her fear your SMV is so low that she is the only option you could get. It then makes her question if you're worth it. Obviously this all happens subconsciously, she doesnt have these thoughts, but her brain does and sends the subconscious cues to "avoid being attracted" to this guy.

Remember women want to feel they are dating a guy that is worth their time. Most guys hit on them, offer flowers, hold the door, bend over backwards for her. She wants a guy with a spine. She wants to feel a guy could drop her without notice because he got bored of her. That challenge is attractive. You throw that all away when you send out messaging that screams "I need you, you're the best I can do." No more "I had a nice time on our date" texts.

2.) " 3 days later I ask her about her upcoming weekend and she says she didn't feel the chemistry. "

NEVER do a "feeler" text or "put the ball in her court" text. Girls hate that. If you want to setup another date. Set a time and day. She will other say yes, or reschedule in her own way. You can open logistics texts actually with any inside jokes you guys created on your first hangout. Just make the opening statement have plausible deniability followed up with a direct day and time.

"Hey my coworkers were telling me about this awesome bar at *insert whatever,* lets check it out. How about Friday at 6pm."

It has a lot of the basics. You didn't text her because you "miss her," you heard about a cool bar and figured you'd offer her an invite. The time and day were "direct." Girls hate when you ask them "umm hey, are you free this weekend? What times?" They hate having the ball in their court to plan things. Especially when framed in a way as if you are trying to take up her weekend availability and just slide yourself in. It makes it look like you have nothing going on "all weekend" and now she has to think of a time and day to accommodate this bored loser who has nothing going on. This is where you start to knock down her attraction to you.

So remember, no follow up "I had a great time" texts. Also when getting back in contact with her to hang out again, use an inside joke or statement with plausible deniability followed up with a direct day and time.

[–]I_LUV_PALAK_PANEER[S] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]AshyLarry27 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Its no problem. The biggest mentor is "experience." Actually "doing" it and screwing up. You ALWAYS learn when you actually live out the moment of something. I always tell people its like learning to drive. You can read the manual and ask around about tips and tricks, but the reality is none of that stuff means jack crap when you're behind the wheel. That's when you are getting REAL feedback at how good you are at judging how much pressure to put on the pedal, the feel for spacial awareness in a big car, turning signals, speed/pace, parking.

TRP gives you an "idea" of how to behave, just like a drivers manual gives you an "idea" of how to drive. Actually hitting on multiple girls and going out on a lot of dates is what makes things more natural, just like how getting good at driving to the point where you get from point A to B while day dreaming comes from the time put in all those years of getting behind the wheel. Hope that makes sense

[–]scissor_me_timbers00 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Infinite_Total_ 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]I_LUV_PALAK_PANEER[S] -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]I_LUV_PALAK_PANEER[S] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link