So about a year and a half ago, I got out of a LTR with my high school sweetheart. We were together for almost 4 years and by the end of we had a son together. I broke up for a lot of reasons, lack of attraction, toxicity, arguing all the time, blah blah blah...but mainly because I felt that she didn't pull her weight in the relationship. Everything was always on me and she would act like I was being unreasonable when I would bring up the fact that she didn't really do shit to help financially( I paid for everything the last 2 1/2 years..her phone bill, her car registration, her clothes...everything, along with all my shit). At first, I didn't care about paying for everything because I genuinely loved this girl, would have died for her, but after a while, it got tiresome being the only one pulling any weight.

Then she got pregnant, she wanted to get an abortion but I personally think it's wrong so I convinced her otherwise. Now since she was pregnant I told her she wouldn't have to worry about getting a job or worry about the financial part, however since she was going to be a mom I wanted her to start reading books on motherhood..how to be a great parent, etc. I expected her to do household chores because she didn't have a job and was home all the time anyway. I thought I was completely and generously reasonable.

Well not long after I set the expectations she started complaining about that too! I told her if things didn't change we weren't going to work out, things didn't change. And to add the cherry on top I found some fun conversations she was having with another dude a couple of years earlier while we were together.(I fucked up and got flirty with a chick at a party early on in the relationship and felt so guilty about it I told her what happened lol. Looking back on that situation I wouldn't have said shit.) So anyways I casually brought up the fact that I found some shit on her phone I didn't want to see, She denied it and called me crazy until I had there little conversation in her face. Then she did the typical girl thing and started rationalizing, “It was so long ago it doesn't even matter, what you did was worse”, she actually said she thought she deleted it lmao. so yea that topped it off right there, I broke up with her a day after that.

Okay so fast forward to today, why do I need your help? Well boys, I miss her, I miss my son, I want to be the father in his life not some fuck face of a dude. Trust me I've had my fun with other women since then but there's something about what we had early in the relationship that's drawing me back. I don't know what to do, part of me says give it a chance and the other part says fuck that shit. I've always been a very deep thinker so it's on my mind all the time. What do yall think I should do?