For 19 years I have suffered in a sexless marriage. Sure, we would have sex when she decided to. But it always goes back to a sexless marriage. I have had enough.

I've been financially reliant on her throughout the marriage and she knows I'm not going anywhere. She makes great money. I am also reliant for my wife's medical coverage.

For whatever loser reason, I can't keep a job. I try, believe me. They last the longest 3 years. I don't do drugs or drink and I am responsible. Now that I am in my late 50s it's very difficult for me to find a job.

What kind of plan can I come up with to finally tell my wife "look, I had enough of this sexless marriage. I want out." I can't do that without a job.

My question is, do I change careers for a more secure type job that will offer me steady income and medical benefits? Of course I do! This is what I should do! The field I am in now (computer related) does not seem very secure. But the money would be better! What to do? What to do?

Our kid starts college soon and there will be no reason (except for our dog at home) for me to have to suffer like this any longer.

Or, do I suggest we separate for a few months to let her feel how she likes living alone? Would the be the first option? They don't offer legal separation in my state. But that's not reason for us to not try it ourselves.