Hello TRP. I wont' bore you with too many details, I'm in the process of unplugging and I've hit a bit of a wall while working on my Frame. I can give more history on myself if it's requested but I largely feel this context is irrelevant.

I've been going on as many dates as I can, been wildly successful with 4/5s but anything above that has been giving me trouble. Essentially I end up LJBF land or beta-orbiter status and nexting the girls I really want to fuck.

When I realize I've lost frame and it's obvious I need to Next, I start asking question about me, my behavior, style, etc. to learn as much as I can about when and where my frame broke and where I need to improve.

Two recent learning opportunities in particular have created an epiphany and I've realized one of the major problems with my frame. I've been rereading a lot of the material but can't find anything really relevant. Hoping to get some pointers to get me moving in the right direction from vets who may have gone through the same thing

Here's the breakdown:

The common theme was 'lack of physical chemistry.' Exact words of girl 1: 'I could tell things were going somewhere, you're great at conversation and there was good tension but for some reason it wasn't exciting.' The exact scenario was drinks, followed by a light dinner. back to my place. escalation to making out and roaming, then she pushed me away and said 'i'm sorry, I'm not feeling any chemistry. This feels really good but something's missing.' my retort of 'Yeah, my cock' was met with laughter and a kiss, but she got up when I tried to escalate. She said good night and left. I asked her for feedback a few days later. She was a pretty awesome chick and happily obliged. she also said 'I couldn't tell how you felt about me the entire night.' I first assumed I wasn't passing shit tests, or this was some LMR.

Girl 2, I know I fucked up from the onset. She was my ideal type and I noticed I was getting oneitis. I course corrected too late. I didn't attempt to escalate things physically fast enough and I was in situations that put me at a severe disadvantage for developing rapport and social proof. but her feedback is what triggered my epiphany.

'I feel very comfortable around you, you're a great companion' and I cut her off and said 'but I'm not exciting.' I started to ask her about how she felt when I was touching her. 'when you touch me it's a shock, and then I start to like it. but I can't tell what you're doing.' This prompted another question 'During our car ride back, when I was rubbing your inner thigh, you didn't know what I was doing?' 'Right, I didn't know what you were doing, but it felt nice' the following conversation was about 4 hours long, and almost back-to-back shit tests. (I did this for the practice, my frame is not yet fully established and this was a great test and learning experience, I was already in orbiter status so nothing left to lose)

Which, to me, is a pretty odd thing. I was reading through a post and saw DEVI mentioned, and that's when it hit me. I'm not emotionally stimulating girls in the higher brackets. I'm creating sexual tension with no passion. My frame has buckled before I'm even approaching. Shit. Everything I do is mechanical. women with stronger frames can see through my bullshit even if they aren't completely aware of it.

The why of this came a bit later, after waking up in the middle of the night. I woke up feeling 'unpleasant' I figured this was tired jitters / adrenal response from being awake too long and enduring a 4 hour battery of shit tests. I Began meditation to calm down enough to sleep. After about 10 minutes I realized that this wasn't jitters, and I needed to sort whatever it was out. After a while I realized I was sad. I first thought it was because of 'losing' girl 2, but after further digging I realized it was because the things that have made me successful in my career are damaging my inner game.

Analytical approaches, a naturally relentless stoic demeanor, a relentless desire for improvement, and a solid understanding of group psychology have served me well. Even while unplugging these traits have been essential.

While leading groups (which is my job, and I'm damn good at it) I naturally mimic the (positive) emotionally energy. IE: It is not my Frame that is leading in this aspect, I am only capable of mirroring/reacting. The exact causes of which I can trace back to emotional trauma/abuse in my early childhood and past relationships and years of practicing meditation. The ability to feel has been beaten out of me. Essentially because I can only mirror emotional energy I come off as comforting rather than dominant. I'm either nothing, or I appear to feel what you're feeling.

Most of the things I'm seeing/reading is about controlling/tempering emotions, meditating and becoming more stoic, but I'm essentially having the opposite problem. I haven't felt something genuine of my own in so long I've forgotten what 'sad' feels like. I feel like this is the critical piece i'm missing, emotion is the root of humor, passion, etc.

TL;DR: How do I begin to develop an emotional side/inner child when I never really had one to begin with? I find this question problematic, as most of the material I've seen seems to be full of BP beta inducing tendencies. I have an opportunity to create this aspect of myself within a fully masculine frame, rather than having to convert it.

EDIT: To make it a bit more clear: My goal is not to get more poon. My goal is to master my Frame. The results of that mastery will be able to get higher quality women, become a stronger leader, and realize my career goals.