Fear of rejection has held me back most of my life.

RedSkeller · 2017-06-09T05:21:59+00:00

Great you've discovered the problem. How'd you get good at anything in life? Practice. How did you practice? Putting in repeated effort for a consistent period of time while learning from unsuccessful attempts (failure). "A ship is safest at harbor, but that is not what they are made for"

_the_shape_ · 2017-06-09T06:20:22+00:00

Most men are like this - terrified to walk up to a girl for fear of what comes next. Understand that if you cross over to the other side, everyone else will recognize you for having the brass balls they believe it takes to simply strike up conversation with a member of the opposite sex. Keep that firmly in mind the next time you see a girl you want to talk to. Convince yourself that you don't want to be like every other chump, and that you are capable of doing something majority of men are too timid to pull off.

It's commonly advised that you talk to everyone as a way to make gaming other girls seem much more natural. Train yourself to get comfortable talking with any person you see on the streets. Think of this as the "baby steps" of the whole process. Don't worry too much about who you talk to (of course, if they reek of piss or are deep in conversation with themselves, move on to someone else), only that you're initiating conversation between yourself and a total stranger.

Want one more perspective to help tilt things a bit in your favor? That girl who might reject you? She's pretty hot, right? In a decade or so, that probably won't be the case any longer. Two decades from now, she'll be recycling memories from back in the day when men actually used to acknowledge her presence.

No need to hate anyone though - that's why they call it "the game", so go out and have fun!

Docbear64 · 2017-06-09T05:45:26+00:00

Get rejected and then don't . For the longest time I was terrified of asking women to dance . I just knew when I would the entire room would point , laugh at me and call me a loser liek some highschool fantasy gone wrong . One night I'm dancing and this pretty chick is sitting to the side of me twirling her hair , I ask if she wants to dance she nods and ... there we go .

The fear of rejection is terrifying no doubt , being approved of makes us feel better, but The fun of rejection and success is the unpredictability of them .

Sure a chick you dig saying " no thanks " may be mortifying but how much more awesome is it if you ask that same chick out and she says yes ?

It's a gamble with very little downside ( temporary shame) and a lot of upside ( a chick who you are attracted to enjoys your company .

Remember YOU are the prize. If she doesn't want to go out with you it's her loss . If the chick hadn't wanted to dance with me oh well I would have kept dancing anyway just like I was before she came by.

1Pink1Stink · 2017-06-09T05:21:14+00:00

embrace it.

lizerpetty · 2017-06-09T20:36:33+00:00

It's not you, it's them. My daughter is 4, and has never met a stranger. She says hello to everyone who crosses her path. Some say hello back. Some will engage her in conversation, some just act like she doesn't exist. Everyone isn't for everyone. I'm willing to bet there are some girls you would reject. It's just life, you're not going to like everyone and everyone isn't going to like you. Chalk it up to life, take a deep breath, put your shoulders back and reset that twinkle in your eye and move on. Good luck!

Title	Fear of rejection has held me back most of my life.
Author	asktrpretard
Upvotes	3
Comments	5
Date	June 9, 2017 5:07 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/6g6dv9/fear_of_rejection_has_held_me_back_most_of_my_life/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/fear-of-rejection-has-held-me-back-most-of-my-life.92324 https://theredarchive.com/post/92324

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