Self loathing

ricks23 · 2017-07-13T02:46:51+00:00

First off, cut it the fuck out. Shit like "I'm a worthless piece of shit", "I know I'm not good enough", "I'm so worthless" need to leave your vocabulary, and if "I approached a girl at the gym and it went fine" is even half true, you know all that negative self talk is just bullshit and all in your head anyway. Your "worth" is not a predetermined amount - we all determine our own worth. What you have isn't a problem of worth, it's extremely bad self-esteem and a fucked up view of yourself.

Seriously, you need to see a professional, your self-esteem issues are too big for us to unravel with some posts in a reddit thread. Go to a therapist. If you think you can't afford one, you're wrong. Many services offer it on a sliding scale and even if you can't find a place like that, in your state you really can't not afford it.

In the meantime, improve yourself. You are already hitting the gym so that's a start. Don't wait for some outside force to validate you, give yourself the worth you want. You may want to pick up a book called "Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice" by Robert Firestone as well. It won't replace therapy, but at least set you on a path of some kind.

Docbear64 · 2017-07-13T03:00:30+00:00

You have it wrong in your head, you need other people to tell you that you're amazing to feel like you're worth a damn . That's not how life works. You have to know you're worth a damn and then when you go out with people they will see it and feel it too . You think of yourself as a turd and want people to call you a gold nugget or diamond ...well how can they ? Your #1 fan ( who should be you) thinks that you are a turd ? how can you hope or desire for anybody on this planet to respect you more than you respect yourself ? You're entire way of thinking is wrong .

First you need to figure out why you are worth a damn , not any dramatic bullshit ,really sit down and think of your qualities, if you have any friends or close family ask them what is good about you ( if you can't do it yourself and avoid asking your parents) . After that you at least know what you're starting with then the next step is to figure out what you want to build up about yourself . It's not going to be easy , comfortable, hell you might not even like it at first but until you make yourself worth something in your own eyes the rest of us have no choice but to look down on you ( whether we actually are or it's just in your head).

GetOutTheRain · 2017-07-13T16:46:10+00:00

In terms of the body of RP theory, you have an issue with frame. That's what you'd want to look at and really dive into and study to understand what you're going through from that perspective.

Aside from that, you sound like you may have issues with anxiety and/or depression. A lot of guys here do. It sucks, but it's something that can be beaten.

I read your other posts about how getting therapy would be very difficult for you. Go to your school's counselors because they often have very cheap (or even free, depending on the situation) therapy options. MoodGym's online program for CBT (which is very effective for anxiety and depression) is like $40 a year if you can swing that.

Hang in there broseph.

Title	Self loathing
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	10
Date	July 13, 2017 2:00 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/6mymbk/self_loathing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/self-loathing.94034 https://theredarchive.com/post/94034

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