I refuse to post in r/legaladvice. Sorry guys.

I would like an opinion.

When I was young, I stayed in trouble. 20 years ago, I got arrested for a series of misdemeanor charges with an ex GF. She and I have stayed in touch, on each other's Holiday card lists, whatever. She expresses regret but we've both moved on in our lives. One of the things I discovered during my time with her is that in my state, in the South, people who hear about relationship problems like to start screaming: DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, RESTRAINING ORDER.

I'm not going to defend those misdemeanors here, but they were misdemeanors for a reason. She and I screamed at each other and there was some contact, scratches and what not. Both ways. We both were physical equals in height and proportions. She was probably superior in fitness. We never punched or slapped or smacked each other. The charges were grabs and scratches. Like an elbow grab when one was coming at the other. Again, young and stupid.

Fast forward a couple of years, I get married, have a kid and it turns out my wife is cheating on me. I ask for a separation because we weren't getting along well and I move out, take care of the divorce and all of the paperwork for custody. Out of nowhere, her attorney says to me; We want more and we're taking out a restraining order because one has been taken out on you before.

I tried to contest it, but the compromise they wanted was for me to terminate my parental rights in exchange for dropping the order. Hell to the nope. My ex wife charged me on about eight occasions with violating the order. Six of them were dropped. Two of them I pled out when her attorney said to me: We'll drop these last two violations with an agreement with the State if you'll terminate your parental rights and delay the divorce. I didn't even understand what they were getting at. Pled to the charges, went on probation, kept my custody. My ex-wife and I were finally divorced around 2009. My ex wife stopped taking criminal charges out in 2013 after the prosecuting attorneys have enough, drop everything and I sue her and one of the police agencies involved (where her family works) to make it stop.

I'm a big guy, over six foot, around 200 lbs. well built. I keep to myself and I really don't like to deal with confrontations. I, after my experience with my college girlfriend, don't even like to have an argument with girls/women/ladies at all.

My best friend calls me up one day in 2013, says Hey, I know what you have been through the last 20 years or so and I think we can help each other out. I say okay. She moves up from Florida, immediately moves in. It felt like it was going to be my dream relationship. Then she doesn't really want to be there, she doesn't like me trying to deal with all the legal nonsense and my ex. She sort of gets a job. She sort of commits to a project. Goes on for about eight months. We take some trips. We plan some future stuff. Agree on counseling, etc. Individually and together.

The arguments with her get worse. Never physical, but extremely vicious verbal confrontations on both sides. She drinks a lot and says it's to deal with the abusive nature of our arguments.

Finally, I realize I had been sold a crock of story that was never going to come true. I tell her: counseling or get out. She won't leave. She says the shrink she goes to see who wants to put her on mood stabilizers is crazy. I finally have enough and we have a screaming match and she gets her stuff and leaves.

Then, she starts in with the wishy-washy restraining order threats. From August until January, we barely talk, she doesn't really want to be in counseling. I never go to the place she is staying. I only meet her out. I text her way too much, call to much. I stop all of this and just resort to hanging out with new people. December goes by, I don't hear from her. January rolls around, she's moving to Boston to be with a former boyfriend, I don't respond.

End of February, a mutual friend (more hers than mine) sends me to Mugshots. Now, I am partially sighted, and losing the rest of my vision, so I forward the mugshots to another friend. It's my friend/ex-gf with an address near me, not Boston. I drop a note the first week of March to that address with no romantic intentions, just reminding her of our last face to face conversation where she said in six months she wanted to be friends (in front of a therapist in November). Her response to the note is to file for a restraining order (She's done this to other bfs in the past) and I ignore it.

She tells the judge for the TRO that I have "numerous guns and knives". I have air soft guns and paintball markers and all sorts of tools around the house. No handguns. (Partially sighted and firearms do not mix) I get arrested before the hearing. And I decide to just blow it off. I spend the money I would have spent on the lawyer on the bail on that stupid charge.

This was all in April of this year. Haven't spoken to the girl, don't know where she is. I come back on reddit in June and all of a sudden, she appears here, talking to other users who start to wonder what the heck is going on. She texts them screenshots of my conversations with other people, pictures of me, legal documents.

Now, she says she's applying for violations of the restraining order because she says the other users talking to her is a violation. I stay out of it. I am not going to argue with someone who only wants to talk about putting me in jail. I did that with my ex-wife for years.

She has made (apparently) a bunch of alternate accounts and followed me around for months on different sites and apparently back to reddit.

What is it about leaving a relationship that causes people to abuse restraining orders? The only abuse we had was yelling. Period. I have on occasion taken car keys if I felt she was about to storm out in anger, possibly drunk and drive. I have once or twice blocked a door way to ask what the heck was going on, then relented and let her leave in a huff. I even volunteered to be the one that left if she got huffy. Or if I got huffy.

Does that rise to the level of needing a restraining order? When she took it out, I had not been near her in more than five months. She was following me around at voat and web sleuths I guess, screen grabbing every word I said. I had not attempted to contact her at all except for the letter in March after she got a DUI and got arrested (odd behavior for her) and seemed to be somewhere other than Boston (her last location according to her) near me.

What am I missing here? She won't go away and relentlessly follows me and threatens to arrest me just for being on the internet. What is wrong with someone like this?