Woman assaults her boyfriend, tells him after he said he would call the police: "The cops never believe the man, you will get arrested"

pirate6728 · 2015-04-12T03:00:29+00:00

Dude---- run!!!! Been there, done that-- it doesn't get better. Either she will eventually kill boyfriend, or boyfriend is gonna have to pull all the stops to protect himself--- which is what she's waiting for so she can serve him with a domestic violence charge. The only way to win is-- get out of it now.

jamminnummeruno · 2015-04-12T05:58:03+00:00

Same thing happened to me. She came to my flat and started vandalizing it and beating me at the same time, knowing full well that she can get away with it. She then called 911 to say I was hitting her. The police arrived and saw the state I was in. They told me I would not be arrested because there was no evidence that she was injured, and that I was "lucky this time". There was no evidence because I never hit her, never once defended myself. I knew that if I did, I was doomed. Getting beaten by her was better than dealing with the police. Plus I loved her, I didn't want to hit her back, even as she was hitting me. I just wanted her to calm down and stop hurting me.

She had made a false accusation and was clearly the perpetrator, but was still treated as the victim by the police. The police saw the clear evidence she had beaten the shit out of me and trashed my flat. I needed hospitalization, and it was apparent, but they ignored me and drove her home. No charges laid. I remember being relieved the police were gone, the people should be protecting me. I felt a lot more unsafe with them in my apartment.

I took a taxi to the hospital after the police left. Apparently I had a light concussion, a fractured rib and a fractured toe. It was surprising that she had no injuries and I had so many, but she mainly used her Doc Marten boots to do the damage. I thought that if I pressed charges it would be turned on me, so I didn't pursue any. And again, I just wanted her to get help.

As any domestic violence victim will tell you, it's very difficult to escape. You have been cut off from friends, had your confidence destroyed and sense of self-worth in the gutter. I was held ransom in a relationship. As a male domestic violence victim, I felt convinced that trying to leave her would land me in jail over something she would make up. Getting blackmailed by the chance of a false accusation.

One time she punched me in the nose and there was blood everywhere. My landlord broke into the flat to see that I was the victim and promptly left.

One time she just started belting me in the face in the middle of the day in a shopping district with plenty of people around. I yelled out for help, and everyone just kept walking by. No one would intervene.

One time she managed to cut one of my eyes with her fingernail and I had to go to the doctor and get an eyepatch that I wore for a week. The doctor didn't think anything of it when I explained what happened. When friends saw me with the patch and I explained what happened they all asked what I did to deserve it, insisting I must have cheated on her.

The violence escalated and escalated the more she knew she could get away with it. She used to say that no matter what I say to anyone, no one will listen, and she was right. She used to tell me that if anyone ever does help me, that she will claim I abused her. One time when we were in a big fight she suddenly insisted that I fuck her. I said no way and she got really mad and said that if I don't fuck her, she will call the cops and say I raped her.

Her final blow came in the form of a full wine bottle. She beat me unconscious with it. She poured a glass of water into my computer to destroy it. She was lighting cigarettes and throwing them at me and on my bed to catch it on fire. At one point I was unconscious and she must have left. When I woke up in the morning there was blood all over the flat but I woke up alive. I called the police and they came over and documented everything.

A few days later they arrested her and charged her with assault. She plead guilty in court. Her punishment was to take anger and stress management treatment courses.

I received no compensation for all of the property she destroyed or any treatment. Nonetheless, I was glad that the nightmare was over. I was trapped for a decade in something I was convinced was only going to end in my death or incarceration.

The only reason this happened to me is because she knew she could get away with it. And she did, for an awfully long time.

perhapsnew · 2015-04-12T01:09:35+00:00

OP (in case they delete it):

Tonight was another night topping all previous incidents with my GF. She (call her Mary) was drinking and I was sober with work on Saturday morning. After 5 beers I knew she was drunk, thats all it takes. After 3-4 beers its like spinning a wheel, 1/3 sick puking night, 1/3 crazy sex night, and 1/3 violent angry abusive night.

I can't stop her, limiting her alcohol or trying to leave the bar/take her home to her parents results in 100% violent angry aggressive nights.

Well tonight we got into a petty arguement. I don't know if it's even an arguement, because I passively deflected all conversation, attempted to change the subject...but not responding to her causes her to go into crazy berserker rage even quicker.

She was trying to tell me how great she is for calling people out on their shit. My friend (Bob) was defending his gf (susan) whose ass was grabbed by another dude. There was a minor fight, and afterwards my GF (Mary) tells my friend Bob, she (Susan) isn't worth it. My gf Mary, hates susan so she was drunkly telling my friend his gf was a no good. Being my friend, Bob deflected this by saying "idk what that's suppose to mean, but it doesn't sound good" and he walked away. Great friend Bob, dude was drunk and didn't want to start shit with me or my GF. I love Bob, great fucking dude.

I tried to tell Mary, that Bob just borderline beat some dude to death for grabbing Susan's ass....then you think its the appropriate time to tell him she is a lousey girlfriend. WTF right?

So i dropped it on the car ride home after Mary wouldn't shut up about it. At home she started getting more and more angry with me, whether I argued back (calmly voiced my disapproval) or stayed silent...her aggression levels heightened. Even changing the subject doesn't help...she has to convince me, even if I say "ok I understand" she isn't convinced.

Her yelling led to her starting to throw punches. She does this alot. Being the guy, our society, yada yada yada, I always try and stop her attacks and never hit back. She's calling me a pussy, saying she can "beat my ass" she can "beat Bob's ass" and that she knows karate. Bob is 6'4 and 250lb, dude works out everyday, can bench close to 400. The guy is the strongest, most athletic built jacked dude I know. So she tells me I am a pussy and can beat my ass repeatedly. I offer her the couch or bed, and I will sleep on the other. I offer to drive her to her home (her parents). She refuses all of this.

She comes after me throwing punches, convinced she can beat my ass. I grab her wrists and prevent any further punching. She attempts to kick me in the groin, i block her kicks and knees with my knee. She won't stop flailing at me. Usually I let go and she attacks until she is tired and gives up. This wasn't the case tonight. I wrapped her up like the most honest police officer dealing with a special needs suspect. Gently waiting and gradually bring her to the ground, until I had 100% restraint over her body and she could not move. I told her if she tries anything when I let go, I am calling the police. I let go.

She flips the fuck out. Her birthday was this week, she shatters part of my gift to her all over the floor (glass yankee candles), cracking my hardwood. She throws all of my paperwork and kitchen things onto the floor. Toaster, bills, pencils, dish drying rack is all over the floor.

She begins to ramble about how we are done, the cops will arrest me for hurting her. "The cops never believe the man, you will get arrested." Finally after 20 minutes of arguing, I convince her to let me drive her home. I have everything on video.

On bad nights I often video tape her aggression and assaults on me. However the next day, we make up and I feel guilty and delete the video. Reddit, please don't let me delete this video

The worst part is, I love the fuck out of 95% of this girl. I've debated on a proposal in the coming months. We talked about her moving in, she is so close to the "one." But after nights like these, I know its not meant to be. I should block her number, forget her and never contact her again. But I can't. I type this tonight because I know my mind and attitude make a 180 come morning. I will reason with myself and convince myself, she's just a girl, you were never in danger, she was drunk and angry, she's allowed to have bad nights.

Another terrible feeling I have, I feel emasculated taking her shit. As bad as this sounds, I understand why woman get hit. I'm not saying that our country, the NFL, the media, are wrong in the PSA's about domestice violence...but this girl is punching and hitting me and calling me a "pussy." If I swing once, she is unconscious...I am in jail and she is a "victim."

I know there are tons of women out there who are true victims...but there are also male victims.

TL;DR: My gf is a crazy angry drunk who hits me and calls me names, break things and threatens me. I am posting this so it's a reminder in the morning to not just make up and continue the cycle of abuse. I fucking hate this girl now, but already feel my feelings of loneliness and miss her already setting in. By the morning I will take her back. Don't do it! Remember and rewatch the video. edit: going to bed, leaving the glass on the floor as an extra level on reminder. update 1: Saved the video, and we spoke this morning for a hour. Her parents know she has anger issues and believe me about the physical altercation. She doesn't drink often, so its not alcohol problems parse. She has anger issues that are mega magnified by her drinking. Her parents are putting her back with a therapist she had when she was younger (i never really knew this) which seemed to really help her in her early teens.

We broken up and told her we need time a part, and can re-evaluate in the future maybe. She cried and cried and apologized, and I even mentioned on the off chance we end up together 6 months down the road, I don't want to see her drink. I am in contact with her parents, her family really are great people. Until then I am going to enjoy time alone.

Thank you for all your replies, I laid in bed and read them last night and some more this morning at work. I read and re-read a lot of comments which helped give me the willpower and re-enforcement I needed to not just accept a quick apology this morning as if nothing happened.

Title	Woman assaults her boyfriend, tells him after he said he would call the police: "The cops never believe the man, you will get arrested"
Author	perhapsnew
Upvotes	16
Comments	6
Date	April 12, 2015 1:08 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/32adrl/woman_assaults_her_boyfriend_tells_him_after_he/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/woman-assaults-her-boyfriend-tells-him-after-he.983287 https://theredarchive.com/post/983287

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