So lately I’ve been really considering divorce. Been married for about 12 yrs now. Marriage was fine before kids and then after having kids everything just got so much worse. I didn’t realize that her parenting style is completely opposite of mine. She doesn’t provide structure or discipline. It’s all about having fun. She also doesn’t eat healthy whatsoever which results in her weight gain but worse she passes that behavior to my kids. They don’t eat any vegetables more much fruits. It’s literally carbs only (pastry, pasta, rice, bread, etc). Let’s not even talk about the nonexistent sex.

So here’s what’s stalling me on whether I move forward. Coming into the marriage I had significantly more money. She came into the marriage with $20k of savings. She’s terrible with finances despite being in Finance. The majority of our combined accounts is money I’ve saved over the years. The house were in, we have about 70% equity through money I’ve earned and saved in the past. In the past 2 to 3 yrs though her income level has surpassed mine but she spends almost all of it. Currently I’ve been unemployed for about 4 months now (im in tech and there’s just a shit ton of layoffs).

What’s gonna happen if I were to proceed with a divorce while be unemployed? Would that work in my favor? How does that affect money and child custody? I don’t want a messy divorce.

Thanks for help in advance!