Hi everyone,
I'm in a really difficult place in life right now and don’t know how to process it.

I'm not divorced yet, but I live under the same roof with my wife and daughter in the suburbs of Toronto. There's no real communication between us anymore. She seems comfortable with that distance, but as an introvert, I often feel deeply lonely here in Canada — a country I'm now a citizen of.

I do my best to provide as a father and a man, but the house doesn't feel like a home anymore. Many days, I just want to walk alone or disappear into a crowd. I often find myself eating alone in restaurants, remembering the days when we felt like a family and were genuinely happy.

Ours was a love marriage. We met at work 13 years ago, got married within two years, and not long after, she started criticizing my family. I’ve always been close to my parents — a dutiful son — but she never liked them and made little effort to connect. Over the years, that gap only widened.

A couple of years ago, I lost my father and sister within months of each other. My sister left behind a 7-year-old daughter who now lives with my mom. Those losses broke me, especially knowing what my mother and niece went through alone. During that painful time, I received almost no emotional support from my wife. I flew between India and Canada four times that year, trying to hold things together.

At one point, we even discussed adopting my niece, but I felt my wife was never truly interested — she wanted another biological child instead.

Since our marriage, I’ve always tried to include her in family and cultural events, but she's consistently avoided them. Lately, I've noticed she's also distancing herself from our mutual friends who share my roots. For context — in India, every state has its own unique culture and traditions. My wife comes from a neighboring state, so while our backgrounds are somewhat different, they're not drastically so. Still, she has made little effort to engage with my cultural side or my community here. When she takes our daughter on playdates, she doesn't share where or with whom — it feels like she's slowly building her own world, one that I'm not part of.

Meanwhile, I've been doing everything to keep things stable for past 13 years — paying for the house, car, and most major expenses. These days I feel like I have to overcompensate, buying toys or creating moments just to prove to my daughter that I'm a good father, even though I've always been present and responsible.

If I stay in my current job here in Toronto, I know I'll reach my financial goals. But emotionally, I’m drained. The only person who truly cares about me right now is my mother, and she knows exactly how bad things have become. The silence, tension, and lack of connection at home are unbearable.

Now I'm at a crossroads:
1. Do I stay in Canada for my daughter and continue living in a joyless, distant marriage?
2. Or do I sell everything and move back to India, where I'd be close to my family, culture, and maybe find peace again?

The hardest part is my daughter. If I move, there's very little chance my wife would follow — and that thought breaks me. The idea of being separated from my little girl is unbearable.

I'm stuck between my own happiness and the fear of losing my daughter. I’m sharing this because I don’t know what’s right anymore, and I wonder if anyone else has faced something similar — staying for your child versus leaving for your own sanity.

I've also reached out to my family physician to refer to a psychotherapist so I can talk through everything and understand if what I'm feeling is real or just in my head. Before making any big decisions — like whether to file for divorce, continue living in the same house, or even stay in the same country — I want to be sure I'm thinking clearly and in the right state of mind.

How do you find the strength or clarity to make that kind of choice?