Crosspost "Parental alienation with 17yr daughter" from /r/Divorce:

Last April my wife of 18 yrs sat me down and said she was divorcing me. In that moment my heart shattered and the tears flowed. I’ve never cried…. Ever . My world seemed to stop and looking over at her it was just another typical Saturday.
In our marriage, I never cheated abused or anything that would be cause for divorce….yet there I was. We have 3 kids (mine yours and ours) I have a 22 yrold daughter from a girl I dated way back (she lives off with our grandson🥰) and wife had a son from her second marriage that’s 20 now and we have a 17 yr daughter together that live with us. We never used stepson or stepdaughter. We were a very close and always were out as a unit.
Now here’s the shit…. I accepted her wanting a divorce…. I could see and especially feel she didn’t love me. I stayed in our house and in 30 days I received my papers, along with court ordered papers for me to leave the house.( that’s a story for later lol). But during those 30 days me and my wife were going to our 17 yrold soccer games traveling 2 hours each way those weekends…. Getting along. Looking back during my last 30 days everyone but me seemed to acknowledge the divorce……. they seemed to have a whatever attitude about it (it was weird) I’m rambling…… ok, my 30 days before papers- everybody is good. I move from my house to a friends unoccupied cabin on the river that day. The following month my son and youngest daughter would video chat and talk and carry on as best we could under the circumstances.
Then …… on a Wednesday we chatted and all was good and Thursday afternoon I try to reach them and “BOOM” I’m hated. WTF!!!! I text wife and she oblivious as to why.
This was last April……i understand my son is an adult so I’ll only refer to my 17 year old daughter from now on but I’m still trying with him too. I would text my daughter ( which btw it’s only been texting since the BOOM …I figured it was for my wife to have records) and maybe or may not get a response. I started out at the beginning saying ILL FIGHT TOOTH AND NAIL FOR MY KIDS!!!!! I mean who wouldn’t?? For six months I’ve been trying and trying but all it seems to do is push them away further. I would go to my daughters other school functions and after the event was over I would go up to her thinking about giving/getting a hug and she would slide away or deny me. Those moments hurt like you wouldn’t believe. I could barely drive home afterwards because I was so upset. So now I still go to watch her nearly every weekend still, I just leave when the game is over. That also hurts but not nearly as much.
My wife and I have 50/50 custody- daughter lives with wife Custody court heard about parental alienation and issued daughter to see therapist so the father daughter bond can be healed. That was last October…… I’m told daughter still isn’t ready for our relationship. And kids have never visited. Only time that amounted with kids was Xmas Eve. Wow- that hurt to say. And the thing is…. As a divorcing man who can’t go to his own house, kids not listening to me without telling me that I’m the one who needs to be fixed and stop playing the victim….. my wife should’ve put a stop to this at the beginning whether from herself or an outside source. I’m never giving up on my kids……but my legs are getting weak from emotional load I carry. I wanted to fight tooth and nail but there is absolutely nothing more I can do but sit and wait . This isn’t fair and if your also going thru this … I know the pain. I’ve tried to explain the situation but if you haven’t lived it or going thru it they will never understand.
So that’s the short version. Lol

Posted by swampdonkey69769 | 11 March 2023 | Link