Separated October of 24 (35f) (39m) married just under 10 together 17 years when divorce was finalized in April of 25.

Over all the process was amicable as can be for a divorce with a young child. We had been heading this direction for a while. At the time she claimed she had a lot of time to think while on a long overseas flight for a work conference. This past Monday while spending time with extended family for the holiday discovered that while on said trip she started a relationship with someone. Pro tip don't tell your ex to read a recipe on your phone while texting your affair partner that's planning an anniversary trip with you from the date of when your affair started. Yeah that was fun. Pretend not to see the text and just left it unread from the notification. Not really surprised that there was a bigger catalyst to getting off the pot of something that wasn't working. Still hurts like hell because for the last year she insisted nothing happened with someone else.

Self esteem was all ready shit and that sure didn't help things. He is a much more financially successful person than I am. I took the last 2 years off to care for our child and on my recently returned to the work force. But prior I was working more trade style jobs and taking care of our homes including major renovations to 2 of them to allow us to move into nicer and nicer places. Also moved states 3 times for her work so was never able to build a career or roll from one to another and grow. Felt like I built her a life, house and gave her a child and now I'm no longer useful.

Only mild benefit is he lives in another country so hopefully won't meet him if this stay serious while I am still in a more fragile emotional state. Still putting myself back together in my own space and not thinking about a relationship with someone else.

Thanks for letting me vent here. Therapy session set for next week. Crap time for my therapists to have a life and be on vacation 😂.