8 years with wife, 5 of those married and 2 amazing kids. Get told she is not happy as can't agree on activities for the kids and she felt differently. I am from nz and grew up in outdoors camping etc and want my kids to have the full experience. And best of both worlds.

I asked if she wanted to see someone to talk through but she did not want to waste money. So, at her request agreed to start the separation process.

3 weeks after, she says she is seeing someone else and it happened naturally and after separation.

I accidentally stumbled upon birth control looking for my sons hearing aid stuff which is the real kicker. She had been off the pill for almost a year as had wanted to stop taking so many pills for stuff and had told me she did not need intimacy anymore which I was fine with.

I am being amicable as she is a great mum to the kids and still get on with my in laws but what the heck!

How do I manage this person with my kids / seeing them before we have even sorted the house without sounding jealous which I am not.

Side note - got a great group of friends who think I am being hoodwinked into thinking it was natural even though she says she would take a lie detector (that was the 2nd thing she said)

Me, I can count the number of people o have been intimate with on 1 hand if that gives any sign of the person I am and know their names.