This is what you can expect when\if the door to divorce is opened. SOP for most marriages heading for divorce. Not all but most.
Right up front you need to understand that the woman you once trusted and loved IS GONE. You now are dealing with someone solely out for HERSELF. In most cases SHE will use your children against you and the court system will have her back.
Here's a bullet list.....fellow divorcees feel free to add or expand on what I have here.
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She's already been planning and sought out family\friends\attorneys. She is 10 steps ahead of you.
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You can expect to be served divorce papers
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You can expect an order of protection (restraining order)
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You can expect she is going to clean out your accounts and lock you out of credit cards and stocks and so forth. If it's possible......she's working on it.
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She is already being advised by her attorney that she will get the children for the sake of child support
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She is being advised on how to get alimony
Some advice. First and foremost is to BE CALM. It won't be easy but you are going to need a level head. If you allow your emotions to get involved YOU WILL LOSE. It's going to be hard as it is but the one thing you can do is control your emotions. That is about all you will have control over as you walk this out.
Secondly.....I would begin documenting and recording everything. You will need a record of communication that the courts can view. Text or emails. Not he said she said. I'd record voice or camera any time she is around.....because they are plotting on how to remove you from your home. The best way is to paint you as a angry violent man. Don't let them do this.
RECORD EVERYTHING......get cameras installed. When you do this.....they will paint you as a paranoid crazy stalker. Doesn't matter.......get the cams in place ASAP.
What I did was changed a lock on my office and basically lived out of there with a camera rolling 24\7. I used a RING cam.....fair priced and gave a cloud backup that I could refer to and download later. Worth every penny.
My EX kicked in the door to my office and later tried to say it was me. I had it on camera. Saved my ass.
You have to keep in mind that the system is rigged against men. It just is. Divorce is big business.....these attorneys want to drag this out as long as possible. Retainers Most only have their $$$$ in mind....and the longer they can keep it going the better. It's all rigged. Keep calm and do your best.
You are in a war of attrition. You can expect this to go on for 6 months to years.
There are many more bullet points of advice I'm missing.....just wanted to get the basics down.....please feel free to add to the list and share your experience.
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