Had a custody hearing today. I filed in April after a silver bullet attempt thwarted by failed reconciliation. Ex parte for custody shortly after that, pro se. It backfired and resulted in the court issuing temporary orders to her because the kids went to school there, and then punting custody back to their jurisdiction- cancelling meditation and the hearing. I got every other weekend. I lawyered up.

We were preparing our RFO in the new jurisdiction and got served with theirs. No new info. I submitted a response, just as with the ex parte- tons of evidence to show she is a terrible parent and doesn't want our 5 minor children, including 2 letters from our 2 adult children stating she is and has been a terrible mother for years and I am the clear parent that represents the best interests of the children.

Went to court today, set mediation for August, child interviews for September, hearing for October. Temporary orders to remain.

She objected to our 16yo son being interviewed because she's not contesting that he will live with me... But the real reason is that she knows he will tell the mediator the truth about her. She wants the 4 younger children, and also objected to our 7 year old due to age. They also objected to our 2 adult children transporting to the interviews, presumably to "keep the children out of the issues" but really because they know all 7 of our children absolutely hate her.

We began to discuss changing the temporary orders, with our family wizard messages from ex consenting to me having the children for the past 35 days straight, week by week, usually hours before pickup, minus one 24 hour period where she called law enforcement on our 12 year old daughter who she was unable to control and was destroying her house- I picked them up.

As we were beginning to discuss this to modify the temporary orders, the judge said we had to recess and could reconvene after lunch. Of course neither attorney was available after lunch so the temporary orders were granted until October.

School starts in August, and on paper she can start them in her jurisdiction. The judge stated the orders were without prejudice and the court would move the children's schools if the mediation process suggested they belonged with me, but I don't have faith in that. So August-October ex will have them in school, and after school program, she doesn't feed them breakfast and locks herself in her room in the evenings, being emotionally and physically unavailable and making the kids fend for themselves- and she'll keep them for her weekends. She'll claim she is the primary caregiver for 2 weeks, and me for 2 days.

The child support on 4 children will ruin me, not to mention I'm already struggling financially having to pay the attorney and paying our community debt she's left me with.

I paid $2200 for the declaration, and another $1500 for the court appearance, for what?

Her attorney is terrible, and mine is actually decent, but the system just shafted us.

All 7 of our children support me and want the 5 minors to live with me. My house is the obvious representation of "the best interests of the children". Their doctors, dentists, and everything else, except school, is already established where I live. They are enrolled in school here, but now I would need her consent to have them go here. She is using them as pawns and if I don't give her what she wants or do what she wants, she pulls back from agreements to the court orders and takes the kids back.

I laid in bed last night and fucking broke down. I hugged 2 of the kids who were also bawling. I'm trying to hold it together, but fuck.