Entry #1

Both kids asked for skipping school on Monday. They were still processing our separation announcement. I've initiated two separate talks with both of them, asking them if they had any questions. They both did, and I answered as frank as I could.

Around Tuesday, things started getting back to "normal". School, work, the usual daily stuff. I've noticed a shift in my older kid - he wants to spend even more time with me, so I've planned some extra stuff for us on the weekend (and we had a genuine blast).

Although things seem to look normal, I know it's FAR from that; I need to be the best father possible here, and be there for the kids every time they will need to co-regulate.

I found an apartment to rent, not far from my house, in a decent price. It has a separate room if the kids would like to sleep over. I should be finalizing the rent paperwork in the upcoming days.

I've had a few comments in my previous entry of you guys telling me not to leave the house. I believe that it might be due to some US laws? I'm from Europe (I don't want to give out too much details) and as far as I know, me leaving a house is not a gamechanger. There are also few other specific factors when it comes to my stbx, but again - OPSEC is important to me so I will keep them private.

In order to keep myself centered, I keep on hitting the gym, lifting heavy stuff, going on longer walks, practicing mindfullness and talking to a therapist. All this shit works pretty well. I know that many more dark moments await me during this process, but I'm ready to face them.

The plans for the upcoming weeks stays the same: being there for the kids, renting an apartment.

Take care everyone.