So my story goes pretty typical met this girl at college we got to know each other things were good for a bit felt like I met my soulmate tbh she was fun out going and just bubbly. As an introvert I don't like ppl to much due to social batteries depleting quickly but when i was with her I felt much better. It was a great few months minus a few moments of negging and gaslighting from her end and threats of suicide if i tried to leave the relationship, it was great. Then covid hit we got separated and I broke it off because i wasn't interested in LDR at all and told her to move on and the vey next day I was called by her to be told that she tried to overdose again and once again the relationship was back on. I tried to find a way to meet up but she placed boundaries up saying i wasnt allowed to go near her place or visit her which i found odd and so did my therapist this is when i started breaking masculine frame as the redpill states, telling her i was anxious about a LDR since i know how they all end and she panicked that i mentioned i was anxious. we continued for a bit but i was getting frustrated since i wasn't allowed to see her and i missed her in my arms at night i started researching ways to bring her closer and I did stupid shit like become vulnerable and try to build a relationship. she started losing interest quickly and one day she asked me what my priorities were and I thought well its summer vacation i want my relationship to be my top priority to show her i can make time to show dedication and that she was special to me and that's when the red pill was introduced. she laughed at me and said HA im the alpha and your the beta. I was confused since I have never heard that terminology in all of my 21 years of life not even my family preaches this and she notified me her brother was teaching her about alpha males and beta males. this prompted me to look into it and i Told her i had read some things about alpha males and betamales and i was going back to my goals i was told no I said ok like an idiot and at that point she took over and left me with no closure and complete disgust that i would even try to initiate sexual activities with her. After that i went full redpill and came across AMS,Rollo,Cooper,Casey Xander and few others. Once i was in i started reading about false allegations from the redpill and just like that i had men threatening to kill me for raping and beating my ex which only pushed me further to the redpill and even black pill. I tried another relationship with redpill thinking i got this ill pass all of the shit tests and everything I made myself look like an idiot and chased away a woman who wanted to settle down and have kids and just build a family once I started doing research into npd I realised alot of the traits the redpill talk about in woman have alot to do Personality disordered woman. I found this place recently and wanted some opinions and advice for dating and healthier alternatives since being "ALPHA " is out of the question. I apologize for holes in the story if anything needs clarifying please let me know.