Woman "loves her man" after he goes roaming around strip clubs in a foreign country with his buddies.
I'd personally consider this a deal breaker, and trust ZERO claims of fidelity if a man did this while dating me.

Disclaimer: I have talked this over with my boyfriend and am in longer need of advice. Summary of this at the bottom of the post. Posting per mod’s request, perhaps to validate other women’s feelings :)

My boyfriend (22M) is currently on vacation with his best friends in a different country.

We have been a couple for about 2 years and I love this guy to pieces. Also, we actually spoke about strip clubs and strippers once where I admitted that I don’t like it at all and he promised me he would never go to one, even if his friends pushed him.

I had quite a shitty night and asked if he was able to call (he was out at a bar at that time) and he said no and apologised. Okay, sure. So I said goodnight and went to sleep.

Now, I just woke up to a text at 3 AM saying they went to a strip club and that he understood if I was upset. That’s it. No explanation or anything.

I wouldn’t break up with him over something like this, but I’m actually extremely upset by this and I feel quite betrayed. To note, I am also quite insecure, so I am unsure if my feelings are valid or if I should chill because it’s my insecurity shining through.

Now, I know that he didn’t cheat. That’s not the point. I just don’t like that he went to a club for the sole purpose of watching hot half naked women (I don’t see this in any way being as okay as watching porn). He knows this and broke a promise, which is why I am so hurt. Are my feelings valid or am I just too insecure?

Update: So I pretty much blew up on my boyfriend this morning, not insulting or anything like that, but expressing how extremely upset and betrayed I felt by his actions. He apologised profusely every single time (which honestly got annoying at the end) but he let me blow off the steam without cutting me off or trying to excuse his behaviour. He assured me that he had not enjoyed the evening at all, he did not get any dances, he felt extremely guilty and was even afraid that I’d break up with him. At first I was extremely frustrated, saying that he could’ve left at any point or at least called me, to which he said he had no explanation and he was sorry.

I have explained that while I trust him fully, I don’t trust him with his friends and that I don’t like that he lets peer pressure get the better of him- that it feels like he will do anything his friends tell him to do. He promised me that he’d never do it again (to which I replied that he could, if he at least prepared me first, but he said he wouldn’t regardless).