The thing that really helped me internalize fds/radfem ideas (before this sub existed) was the realization that pleasing men is a losing game.

Women are constantly self-aware and self-critiquing, modifying our appearance, voice, tone, and attitudes to placate the men in our lives. We think that if we could just be prettier, chiller, more spontaneous, more exciting (the list goes on), then we will be protected from all the horrible things that we fear -- being cheated on, being told we're too boring, being told we're not attractive anymore to our boyfriends/husbands. If we just tweek this physical characteristic and that personality trait we'll finally get it right.

But it's not a game we can win. Men have a variety of words ready in the chamber for when we get out of line. Bitch, cunt, whore, prude, hoe, thot, slut -- all words that are used to maintain the status quo and make sure women aren't truly free to act and say what they want.

It's easier said than done, but truly removing males' opinions of you is a necessary step toward actual freedom and happiness. The sting of being called a "bitch" is lessened when you realize there's a million different ways to lose this game and if you avoid being called a "bitch" they'll just call you something else, eventually.

You can't win the game. The only winning move is not to play.