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Stop playing the “nice guy”!

OsamaBenLadle

December 6, 2019

20 upvotes

/r/FemaleDatingStrategy

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Post Information

Title	Stop playing the “nice guy”!
Author	OsamaBenLadle
Upvotes	20
Comments	6
Date	December 6, 2019 4:26 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/e70xmk/stop_playing_the_nice_guy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/stop-playing-the-nice-guy.687417 https://theredarchive.com/post/687417

Comments

[–]SmirfySurfFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]OsamaBenLadleFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]SDgirlburnerFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]OsamaBenLadleFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Oh, I don’t. Trust me, if my friend didn’t say, “Hey, just let ____ and I deal with this”, my ass would’ve screamed at him. I’ve been keeping my lips tightly shut so I don’t explode on him. Though, at least my aggressive, facial expressions and hostility got the message across.

She ended up talking to him, but I don’t think it was a good idea to talk to him like a puppy that tore up a cushion. That’s why I wanted to be the one to say it. But I rather not meddle which sucks since I feel like this creep didn’t get what he deserved. I don’t want to lose or upset a close friend even if it means to call out a pig.

I believe that her tone and language talking to him after his harassment is just going to enable him to try harder. I don’t think she wants that, nonetheless I assume she’s worried about the consequences since we all work together. But good news did come out. She actually told our managers (who are very reciprocative to us) so I’m sure they’ll keep an eye out. Even if I think he deserves to be fired as this behavior has intensified these past few months, it’s better than nothing. I wish she wasn’t scared to be abrasive.

Edit: I’m curious though. I have heard and read quite a few issues in regards to women in the military. That men especially harass and sexualize women in there. I assume women are very much marginalized in the military. You mentioned that you’ve had to be upfront with disrespectful behavior. Are my suspicions true? Is harassment even more common and ignored in the military?

[–]SDgirlburnerFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh yes, the military is quite the harassment playground. Sadly if you are alone and the LVM around your perceive weakness, you will deal with it ALOT! There are avenues to report but it’s a “I don’t want to rock the boat/ruin his career” type mentality. Females are few, so I made a point to talk to all the ones outside my job to let them know they can ALWAYS talk to me and ask me about strange behavior. I’ve reported men on their behalf or urged them to report harassment and assault. It’s the young women that need the mentorship the most. It will never stop because men are getting worse and aren’t being raised right. The women just want to have male mentors that aren’t trying to sleep with them. Granted it’s not that bad everywhere, the more rank you get the less you get messed with, but those poor younger ones can end up in some really crappy work sections with LVM’s. Nothing worse then a LVM with rank and “power,” when I was a Marine there was always the running joke of the Gunny (E-7) getting first crack at the new females. Stereotypes are stereotypes because they were once true. 🤷‍♀️