Tell me about a time...

2020-06-26T11:46:26+00:00

I had an older female friend last year. I was 24(F) at the time and she was 31(F) turning 32. She was childless but had an awesome apartment, nice car, stable employment, and went on trips. However she was extremely desperate like she would date NVM and wonder why she couldn’t get married. I would be like sweetie, drug dealers don’t want to be married and you don’t want to be married to a man like that. Anyway she got pissed at me bc I was never down to chill with her at the bar with NVM. Claimed I was “judging” her and became very flaky. I never judged her, I was just honest with her and told her she deserved better and I refused to hang out with NVM. Somehow that made me a “judgmental” friend. Honestly though she is one of many friends that I’ve had like this. I honestly don’t hang out with many women bc I live in a small city filled with pickmes and it’s crazy bc they’re all beautiful goal oriented women yet they go for the absolute worst men.

suriservshumnty · 2020-06-26T13:53:39+00:00

I had a pickme friend that I separated myself from. She is the kind that ALWAYS has a boyfriend, that is ALWAYS "the one" this time, very obsessed, all lvm so clear and obvious on the outside. Example, she was obsessed with this guy that was a camp counselor in the summer. He convinced her that no cellphones were allowed, no phone calls and so he couldnt talk to her for the ENTIRE summer. And she accepted this! I knew it was BS and told her that he was prob cheating. And it turns out, she wasted an entire summer while he WAS cheating with another girl living at camp, the entire summer. She was heartbroken and did the depression photos and quotes and Facebook statuses, which only gave HIM more power when her intentions were the opposite. Then a few days later, theres a new guy. And it happens all over. I had to take a step back when her obsessions took over our time spent together, like she would be talking about them non stop. And the final straw was when she started to brag, try to one up me and try to shame me for not having a man of my own and no rush to get married and stuff.

2020-06-26T12:34:12+00:00

Sadly both of my current friends are kind of pickmes. Especially one that I'll call M. She once tried to "teach me" on how to get a boyfriend and I can just sum it up with "Ask him what he likes in a girl and then be that". No matter whether it was uncomfortable for you or not.

Luckily tho, I recently graduated high school and my old class was absolutely full of gross dudes and pickmes. The girls would let the dudes chase them around the class and touch them in private areas as if it was cute. I always found it gross. I'm glad I'm finally out of that school!

Sadly tho I don't think I'll ever be getting rid of a friend anytime soon since I only have 2 and even now I'm high-key lonely lmfao

2020-06-26T16:53:35+00:00

I had a pick me friend in college...let things go with her when she stayed friends with a man who had raped another girl on campus and sexually assaulted myself + one of our other friends in her sleep.

lanaisg0d · 2020-06-26T17:13:32+00:00

I’ve known her since we were 12. All her romantic partners have been NVM. Lately she has been dating this married old man who’s old, ugly and bald who also treats her like shit and doesn’t even pay for her cabs but demands her to go see him to bang whenever he’s “free” AND SHE DOES! She has been him for 4 years. I was always there for her hearing her drama trying to give her advise trying to boost her self-esteem. Lately when I try to share my problems with her she reads it but won’t answer. This happened twice. And I realized it’s unfair for me to be there for her no matter what but she’s not there for me to listen to my issues. I don’t need her pickmeisha energy around me so I’m not gonna try to keep in touch with her. She needs me more than I need her.

hilariouslystated · 2020-06-26T17:29:58+00:00

I had a pickme friend who would call me to complain for hours about her boyfriend almost every night. She'd complain about his lack of communication, his terrible hygiene (he refused to wash his hands or bathe regularly), and his overall immaturity. I would suggest she dump him. She'd say no, that she just had to "communicate with him more". That is wasn't "so bad". But the cycle of complaining would repeat over and over again until I was starting to feel mentally and physically exhausted at the thought of talking to her. I couldn't do it anymore and had to let her go.

idiosyncraticg1 · 2020-06-26T17:59:47+00:00

I think I’m in the process of letting one go, or at least distancing for a while.

She’s such a strong, smart woman but when it comes to guys she’s weak. She idolizes relationships. If her man messes up, she deals with it on her own and doesn’t tell anyone. She stayed in a relationship with a guy for years because she simply didn’t realize that what he was doing was wrong because she never talked to anyone about it! Then she dated another guy and was really needy. She planned out their entire future together and I felt like an asshole trying to tell her to slow down. She described the guy as extremely nice and caring, yet when I finally witnessed them together he was the polar opposite and she was extremely clingy.

Title	Tell me about a time...
Author	holodeckdeathtrap
Upvotes	31
Comments	8
Date	June 26, 2020 8:32 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hg3u2d/tell_me_about_a_time/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/tell-me-about-a-time.699039 https://theredarchive.com/post/699039

Comments