Fair warning this may not be the most concise or articulate post but I feel like writing about this in the only place I can on Reddit.

I was a late bloomer that didn't really fully develop socially until late highschool, so I didn't start getting noticed by guys until the beginning of college. I went into the dating and libfem hookup culture fairly quickly cause I had only heard good things and I was ready to feel "empowered" now that I was off in a new environment.

The amount of stress this naturally caused me turned me into a husk because I participated in something that does nothing but put women on the market for male benefit, while also calling itself "empowering" and "liberating". I found myself in mental circles for years because of how much of a mindfuck this was for a developing young hetero woman that has to deal with males.

I developed body dysmorphia after SO MUCH negging by men that I had been with and found myself worrying about STUPID shit like my skeletal proportions and how my vagina hole looked because of dumb nitpicks guys felt the need to point out (even though they had ugly bumpy, skinny, off colored dicks! And no body!).

I remember how empty and disrespected I felt after "consenual hookups" because deep down I knew I wasn't hooking up, I was just a fleshlight for some loser for 20 minutes. I remember how awful it was to deal with men that "date" you only to keep you around as a sex resource and how'd they blatantly lie even when you put evidence of their true motive in their face.

I remember practicing libfem "communication" and relationship advice where I always, always left apologizing and feeling like an asshole. Somehow, someway everything they did wrong was my fault, or that I was "being problematic" for communicating in the first place.

I remember thinking I liked BDSM when it only dried me up because how much libfeminism marketed it as "essential" to a "healthy" sex life. I remember getting guilted for "not appreciating" when men tell me how fuckable I am the price I have as an object in their heads. I remember getting called boring and prude when I expressed wanting a monogamous, long term relationship over fruitless hookups.

And then I found Reddit. I used it mostly for people's opinions or reviews on video games or things I wanted to buy for my other hobbies. I never really used it and only saw it as a site to get honest opinions, so of course one day I found myself in relationship advice asking how to avoid getting used and abused by men only looking for a body and the responses I got infuriate me in hindsight.

I got told that it was MY fault that men use me, and that if I didn't want to be used for sex then I had better "bring more to the table". I was told that I must be boring and horrible in real life because guys only do this when women don't "deserve more". When I had denied that and said, "I can be as boring as a rice cracker but I still deserve to be treated honestly if I'm honest" I got dog piled by a dozen men, because I had dared to insinuate that men may be gasp doing something wrong to me and that it has to be the men, not myself, that has to change.

I was only eighteen when this happened and I ended up going through relationships thinking that mens issues are my fault for YEARS. If only FDS had been a sub back then and told me "No it's not your fault when people treat you like shit and it's not your responsibility to 'fix' assholes". I would've saved myself so much sleep, so much time, and I wouldn't have had to work for years to unravel the self esteem issues I was given.

Reddit is a male site and men are like companies -- they don't care who or what they exploit to get theirs, and above all they DO NOT want anyone comparing notes and becoming lucid to their bullshit tactics and scams.

Men hating FDS is a clue that these principles are doing something RIGHT. Thank you mods so much, thank you to everyone that put the love and effort in to elevate this sub into what it is now. It's a godsend and I'm happy it's a reference for women to come.

Edit for clarity: It wasn't that one incidence alone that cause me so much relationship grief, but that was the attitude that I was met with by almost all men when it comes to dating and that was enough to influence my decisions for years :(