Why Does He Do That? Book Thread Discussion Week 1

FurryBellyButt0n · 2020-07-18T00:00:52+00:00

One thing that really shocked me when I initially read the Introduction section of the 2002 revised version was...

This quote on pg xviii: ""they become attached to the various privileges they earn through mistreating their partners, and they have habits of mind that make it difficult for them to imagine being in a respectful and equal relationship with a woman."

Even in the Introduction, Ludy is making it very clear to the reader that an abusive and/or controlling man's actions have NOTHING to do with their feelings, an underlying mental health concern that is unmanaged, or previous trauma but rather their mindset of superiority and the benefits they gain from mistreating women. I appreciate how direct he is in trying to breakdown that myth that our society often uses to justify male mistreatment.

FurryBellyButt0n · 2020-07-18T00:03:45+00:00

One standout quote that resonated with me for this section is Ludy Bancroft's operational definition on the word abuser as it's in perfect alignment with FDS principles:

"I have simply chosen the words abuser as a shorthand way of saying 'men who chronically make their partners feel mistreated or devalued.' " (Introduction xvi)

Phoenix__Rising2018 · 2020-07-18T02:54:10+00:00

You know this is a really nice idea but we can't have a brand new member to the sub running a book club under our name. And I really hate to do this because you're clearly very enthusiastic but I think you need to spend more time and advance maybe to the disciple or strategy coach level flair before we would consider letting you go forward with the book club. We just have to make sure everything is in line with FDS principles.

Thank you!

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