*posted this and immediately noticed the spelling error in the title. Egg on my face

saw a video of a man putting down a woman because she posted about breaking up with her boyfriend over lost attraction. The caption was "girls are all the same" and I sort of laughed at it, it gave me Bart Simpson sad edit vibes. I looked in the comments expecting people to make fun of him or defend the girl- I was wrong. All of the men in the comments were putting her down and calling her shallow.

It suddenly hit close to home because I've experienced this as well, as I'm sure many other women have too. Men expect us to be attracted off of personality or to "give nice guys a chance". It's absolutely ridiculous- WE DESERVE TO FEEL ATTRACTION TO OUR PARTNERS.

We are also pressured into dating men we don't find attractive. I had a male friend who was nice enough, pursued me for years and years, and everyone we worked with always insisted that I should date him because "he's sweet and deserves a chance". But what about me? Do I not deserve a boyfriend I find cute? Isn't that also just as cruel to him as it is to me, to force myself to like him?

Another man pursued me. Another coworker, don't work at McDonald's it has tons of creepy guys. He had told me he liked me for years and had a crush on me in school. He told me he usually only wanted girls for sex, but I was different, I was special. Seriously fuck that guy. I told him straight up- I'm not into you and I don't find you attractive. Then the bullshit starts, "I can spoil you, I'm ugly but I can make you happy, I have personality to make up for it-" OR the guilt trip method "Oh girls are never into me, I'm too ugly. I shouldn't have even tried. Blah blah blah-"

And it's worse when his friends join in or pressure you to date him. No, I don't want to give your buddy a chance, he's ugly and he reeks, go away.

It's all stupid. It's all bullshit and lies. I'm going to be blunt and I'm not going to soften this statement: I am a beautiful girl and I expect to date an attractive guy. And so should you. You cannot force yourself to like a guy, trust me I've tried. Women deserve to feel attracted to their partners, and not just settle for a man because he's "sweet" or "nice". We need to start expecting more because heaven knows they expect a lot.

Also "nice" isn't a personality trait, it's bare minimum. Remember that. If the only good trait of a man is "he's nice" that's not good enough. It's basically saying "he's not bad", absolutely the bare minimum.

And I'm going to finish off by saying ugly men expect to date beautiful women. Men complain about their girls body to their face and expect them to change. Old men expect and manipulate young girls to date them. There was a study done that asked men their ideal partners age, and all men stated girls in their early twenties. And some even said they would have said a lower age if they could. So, no, women aren't "shallow" for wanting a good looking partner. Men are shallow and actually disgusting for wanting to date teenagers.

If you think your standard is too high, you're wrong, raise it some more. And at the end of the day if you cannot find a man to meet those standards, it's okay to be alone. I would rather die alone than with a partner I never fully loved.