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I came home from work early (I'm an OB nurse so my hours are pretty unpredictable) and found female sneakers in the garage that weren't mine. At that point, I sort of already knew what I'd be walking into. My husband has recently become very fit and has been consistently going to the gym, during which he made a female friend who he even brought home for dinner last week. She's beautiful and thin and everything I am not, which instantly made me feel horrible. So, I talked to him about it. He encouraged me to build my confidence and reassured me he loved me and would always be loyal to me.

I walked into the laundry room from the garage and sort of tiptoed around the house before going upstairs. They were having sex. In our bed. With a framed picture from our wedding above the nightstand next to it. I silently left the room and got back in my car with tears streaming down my face and drove to get food and just sat in my car crying since. Its now almost 1am (walked in on them at 7pm) and I've returned to the hospital. He called me asking why I wasn't home and I told him my shift is extended but in reality, I'm laying in one of the on call rooms bawling my eyes out as I type this.

I feel so worthless and ugly and stupid. I don't even know how to proceed. On one hand I want to divorce him and never see him again, but on the other hand, I'm an ugly woman....its not like I can do better. I just want to die. I feel so gross and the self-loathing is getting too much right now. Advice please.

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Edit: Thank you all for the kind comments and support. Please stop commenting, however. I think I've heard just about everything (including some horrible things about my weight). I don't care about "internet points" or whatever and the notifications are getting crazy. Reading through these comments has been a nice way to keep myself sane these past few hours. I still have no idea what I am going to do and I know everyone wants me to leave, but a marriage is more than can be illustrated with a couple of words on a website. He was a great husband and I can't help but feel at fault for neglecting myself weight-wise. I don't know if I will stay, but that's all I really know right now.

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Edit: I didn't expect this to blow up as much as it did and while I'm incredibly grateful for all the nice and supportive comments...please please please stop messaging me about how I should stop eating or laugh at me for expecting a faithful husband while being overweight. It is incredibly upsetting and I am already going through a lot. I feel I need to clarify since everyone seems to care that I had food after I found out. I had been working a shift from 7am to 6:30pm during which I had been all over the place. I had lunch at 11am and nothing else until I left. I was starving and hurt and driving around with tears streaming down my face. Please stop harassing me about that.