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[–]slamdunktiger8611 points12 points13 points 6 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
I got my dog when I was ten. We had a glorious 15 years together.
He changed my life from an awkward, shy loner into a fun, well-rounded man with character and humble ethos.
Without him, the child abuse and adult abuse would’ve destroyed me. I easily could have and should have self-medicated myself to death for all of the unresolved childhood trauma. I score 8-9 out of ten in the Kaiser adverse childhood experience test. Nearly every trauma a male child can experience, I experienced. I feared the adults of my family as death incarnate. I never knew when the next concussion might go past that last inch of life.
My cousin wasn’t so lucky. No dog, single whore of a mom. By age 16, was abusing every class A substance except heroin and opiates. I tried to save him with rehab, professional therapy and legal emancipation. I asked him to volunteer all his money to me so he couldn’t pay for his vices. I got him silver bullion and baby sit it for him.
Then he disappeared, found a new psycho GF and partied through Europe for months.
He relapsed, he tried to connect with me again, nearly got me thrown in jail when he got us into an altercation while he was driving. He had mushrooms and weed on his person without telling me. If things had gone badly, I would’ve gone to jail for a long time and as he was a minor.
He was just too toxic to touch. I had to just say I can’t see you anymore. I set four important boundaries. If not fulfilled, I will mourn his loss and go my own way because like JBP mentions, if I’m trying to save the life of a drowning man, you can bet for sure, I ain’t willing to die with you.
My boundaries: 1) gtfo out of the family 2) get a job and skip college, do internships and build your skills outside of academia — he was too undisciplined and impulsive to last in a classroom setting 3) get self-knowledge, continue with therapy, understand and process his life and suffering, do not forgive the abusers (that’s bullshit enablement and codependency) 4) get a blue belt in jiu jitsu (he needed a workout routine and enjoyed school sports but kept getting kicked out for grades, plus he needed character and discipline)
(I’ve done all of the above, plus a bachelors but still enjoying my white belt for the last two years.)
The difference between me and him? We looked like the classic Asian suburban family of academic prodigies. Lexus in the front of the house, countless felonies in the back.
Kicker? His mom, my aunt, was raided later by federal marshals for human trafficking. So was my uncle in China. They both snitched like Takeshi69 on their connections in both Asia and North America and got out in months.
This was just one aspect of part of the family business.
There is not enough justice in the world.
I went my own way nearly a decade ago and have zero contact besides that chaotic two year chapter of trying to pull my cousin out of the hell I clawed out of.
It broke him.
I survived because I had a great dutiful dog. I saw a quote at bass pro shops on the ceiling years later that read:
“If a man is intelligent enough, there is nothing a good dog cannot teach him.” -sorry cant recall author
My dog truly saved my life. I should not be alive.
My cousin, wasn’t as fortunate.
[–]WrongTime012 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wish I could bring my dog with me to college
Too bad she doesn’t like new people
[–]wizwocket0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Dogs are faithful. Blow jobs are cheap.
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[–]slamdunktiger8611 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]WrongTime012 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]wizwocket0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link