What do you think to yourself when the smell that society has tweaked you to prefer comes back. I know this side. I have taken the red pill. But sometimes the wasteful pleasures seem greener on the other side when I truly know it’s not. But I feel like I am empty and depressed without that taste. It’s like an addiction such as smoking; you know it has no good effect on you bu your primitive instincts drag you in. It kills me on the inside like a burning forest.

Personally there is someone I have deep feelings for. And I’m sure she feels the same about me. But I don’t want to waste my time. I love her but I don’t need her, she doesn’t need me; only instincts that will waste my time and potential. I want to learn to overcome this feeling dragging me down, burn it down completely. It kills me and I can’t stand it. I want to become the best possible person I can be like Tesla. But I can’t handle these feelings coming back down every other week like Vikings to raid my feelings. It’s like I’m drugged with a blue pill and I know it. Help.

Update: Thanks a lot for the advice. I know what I must do. I must understand how a woman thinks in order to get rid of these thoughts and end these instincts. I have fear, and we fear what we do not understand. I want to laugh at these thoughts. And I will.